Two down, five to go.

Meterology exam today - passed with 85%. This was an enormous relief to me as I had done bugger all study.

And further entertainment came later that evening. Returning home we bought some BBQ chicken to have for dinner. We enjoyed our evening repast immensely, and sojourned to the computer room to check email.

Who should so proudly stride into the room with the remains of a quarter of a BBQ chicken firmly grasped in his mouth but Houston the Wonder Cat, miaowing triumphantly as if to say;

"look at how clever and loyal I am! I caught a BBQ chicken for you!"

I laughed so hard I barely had the heart to take it off him. Maybe next time he'll catch a bottle of beer out of the fridge for me.

I was in Newcastle on Saturday, visiting my SO's family. She had some shopping to do, so I grabbed a bite to eat and hung around the mall waiting for her.

A large group of yoofs were hanging around on bikes and in animated conversation with a scruffy man who seemed to have trouble remaining perpendicular to the ground. Without warning he removed his shirt and lay down on the pavers. The yoofs then proceeded to jump his prostrate body with their bicycles. The stunt completed, the scruffy man stood up, then he and the yoofs bid their good days and went about their separate ways.

Dinner and a show. It certainly passed the time.

Are there any Canadians present? There are? Oh, dear. You're not going to like this next post.

I have a maple tree in my front yard. Now, I'm sure that in it's native land it is a wonderful thing, and I know it is the Canadian national symbol - but what the hell is this abomination doing here? It drops it's seed pods all over my lawn which go brown and are like miniature caltrops. As I surveyed my lush greenery this morning, I weighed the options - rake or no rake? I prefer no rake as I am a lazy bastard. I figured I'd just mow over the little brown balls of death, they would be chopped to pieces by the mower bland and deftly deposited into the catcher.

Sadly, Mr Victa had not considered that someone would do anything as stupid as mow over rock hard carapaces, and instead of throwing the things into my catcher, the mower whipped them every which way. At speed. I'm not sure who was more nervous about the prospect of being branded with one - me or the postie riding past as my petrol powered grenade launcher bounced maple seeds off his helmet like an automatic ball server on crack.

OK, I'm exaggerating a little. It missed him by a couple of feet, easy.

I can't wait for winter, when the bastard will shed it's leaves and turn my lawn into a rotting, brown, tribute to Canada. Joy.

EXCERPTS FROM A DOG'S DIARY, EXCERPTS FROM A CAT'S DIARY

Further from my previous post - my next exam will be meteorology. I quite like meteorology - I find it fascinating. Unfortunately, I find meteorology textbooks as boring as batshit. Storms, clouds, ice, wind, rain - amazing stuff. Diagrams of same? Not so much. Why does it all have to be so dry and clinical? Ho hum. Perhaps the textbooks need to be more animated. What I need is a video about meteorology, or better yet - a meteorology pop-up book.

I have passed my first commercial pilots licence test. I scored a respectable 87%, which, with a pass mark of 70%, is neither conspicuously good, nor conspicuously bad. One down, six more to go.