Friday, December 12, 2003

Today is good sleeping weather. I should explain that I work shiftwork - 2 days on, 2 nights on, 4 days off. Great! I hear you exclaim. 12 hour shifts. Oh, not so great. I'm also on dayshift today. It's persistantly raining and windy, perfect for sleeping, here I am at work. But that's cool, I love rainy weather. I should live somewhere where it's cold and rainy all the time instead of Sydney. If you know of such a place, kindly forward this information to me, it will be duly noted.

Now, because we work round the clock in the office, we have to hot-desk, but more importantly hot-seat. For those of you not familiar with the concept, that means you park yourself on the seat just vacated by the person you have taken over from, which is still warm from their buttocks, hence hot-seat.

I don't like it. The only adjective I can come up with which adequately describes the feeling is 'icky.' It feels icky.

Even worse is sitting on a warm toilet seat. Is this just me? You like to have the illusion that you are the first person to use the toilet. You know it's an illusion (although if you were a plumber, you could deflower a virgin toilet just about every day) but you don't need a physical reminder of how recently someone else defecated in this very spot. A good television forensic scientist could probably work out an approximate time of evacuation. Icky, non? Oui, c'est tres icky.

I hear you can purchase toilet seats with electric warmers, presumably for colder climes. If I designed toilet seats, they would have chillers. Nothing says 'virgin toilet' like a goose-pimpled bot-bot.


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