Yesterday I woke up at 0558, two minutes before the alarm went off, so this morning as I lay in bed waiting for the alarm to go off I suddenly thought to myself, "say, that alarm hasn't gone off." Suffice to say I had forgotten to set the alarm the previous morning and it was now 0658.

I rang work to say I was going to be late (I start at 0700), quickly washed, brushed teeth, dressed and scurried out to the car. To save time, no time to shave.

So here I am at work looking like a tramp who has been rudely awakened, stuffed into powder blue cotton and chinos and shoved behind a desk. The boss just asked me "how often do you bathe?"