I had a very strange dream last night. I dreamt I was in Nazi Germany in 1943. Everything was in black and white like 'Schindlers List.' With me was Jerry Seinfeld, whom I was attempting to keep out of the clutches of the Gestapo. He kept screwing about and making gags while we were being chased by the SS led by teams of baying German Shepherds.

Let this be a lesson not to have that last slice of pizza with extra cheese before going to bed.