The Online Temple of Chris Parkes

Uneven number

2012-01-14T20:22:00.002+11:00

There is an old saying that the rule for pilots is to try to keep the number of takeoffs equal to the number of landings. I am now short one landing, because the other day I went skydiving.

I had done the ground course a month earlier but constant bad weather and other commitments had kept me from completing my first jump until the new year. My calendar was as clear as the sky, so I had no excuse not to make the drive down to Wilton near Picton to leap out of a perfectly good aeroplane.

Arrived around 1100, handed over my skydivers logbook and waited for my instructors to find me. A bright yellow and red jumpsuit covered my civilian cloths and I strapped an altimeter to my wrist.

Fully, a young Kiwi guy greeted me and we went off to find a parachute. Fully showed me how to step into the thing and how to strap it on tight along with a helmet and a pair of painfully tight goggles. Mick, a very experienced instructor started quizzing me on my knowledge and abilities. He seemed barely satisified by the halting responses I gave him but we all waddled down to the waiting Caravan.

The engine ran while we boarded, the sound of a roaring turboprop usually sounds pretty good to me, but I felt strangely unenthused. Long padded benches were along the floor of the aircraft as I turned and slid back into position, Fully taking the spot immediately in front of my and Mick beside. We waited a few seconds, the exit slid closed, double checked the altimeter read zero before the pilot turned the aircraft around and pushed forward the throttles, the noise increasing in intensity and pitch. I was impressed by the way the pilot picked up the nose wheel and held it up as we roared down the gravel strip before rotating and climbing at what felt like a pretty steep angle.

I turned and looked out the window at the strip to try and memorise the view of the field from the air as we made a long climb to altitude. I don't recall if we climbed upwind or not. The sensations were all so strange and powerful it was had to take everything in. Fully and Mick checked that I was all good. I responded with a thumbs up and said "good to go." They later told me I looked quite bored by the whole thing. Apparently my visible response to being terrified is to appear uninterested.

Around 12000 feet a yellow light illuminated. Mick shouted that we would be third out the door. I nodded. The exit opened and the engine noise subsided as the pilot throttled back. The first group of jumpers crouched at the doorway before unceremoniously hurling themselves out. The second group did the same and Mick and Fully positioned themselves either side of the door as I shuffled forward to kneel in between them. The whole environment seemed hostile, it was very cold, the slipstream pounded on the side of my face as I looked down through the clouds to the blue green earth 4 kilometres straight down.

The training kicked in as I checked left, right, looked to the horizon, and half fell, half leapt and no doubt was half bodily thrown from the aeroplane.

There's a short period immediately after exiting the aircraft I have no recollection of. Mick later told me my arms and legs were waving like a rag doll, so it's likely I experienced some senory overload and blacked out for a second or two. The next thing I remember is looking at the horizon in the distance through a pair of very wide eyes. The air rushing past me roared like a speeding train and the pressure made if difficult to breathe so I gulped air like a landed fish and went though my workcycle to maintain awareness.

The first awareness checks came and went as we hurtled towards the ground. Some people describe skydiving as being like underwater or like flying. I felt it was like falling rapidly towards the ground, acutely conscious of the rapidly unwinding altimeter. Perhaps my flying experience had made me a better judge of my position based on looking at the ground, but I could see features below getting ominously larger.

The final awareness check came and I reached for my pilot chute. My hand failed to find it on the first attempt, which is considered poor technique. On my subsequent attempt my hand closed around the lovely squeezey rubber ball and I pulled the thing out as hard as I could, counted one thousand, two...

...and was jerking like a hooked fish under a big bright and perfect canopy. I reached up for the yellow toggles and pulled the chute fully open. There was still too much going on for me to do everything I needed to do perfectly, my mind still catching up with the rapidly proceeding events. Looking down I couldn't quite make out the drop zone, but I found the X of the freeway crossroads and the airfield beside it.

The parachute was a lot more sensitive and agile than I thought it would be and took little effort to maneouvre. As I got closer to the dropzone the radio in my helmet chirped as the target assistant told me he could see me. A large yellow arrow is used to help the student jumper to maneourvre to land and it was a simple matter to follow the arrow as the TA guided me into the circuit. Before long I could make out a figure holding up a pair of batons and began mirroring his signals as he lined me up and commenced the flare to land. My feet landed followed shortly after by my butt as I slid along the grass and came to a ungainly halt. My heart was pounding and my shaking hands did a poor job of gathering in my chute as the TA joined me and helped me sort the chute out properly.

When I first flew an aeroplane I knew that it was what I was meant to do, I loved every second of it and I have thoroughly enjoyed every aspect of piloting since. On the jump course I met a young guy who expressed the same thoughts about skydiving. I can unequivocally say I did not feel the same way about skydiving. It's possible I would skydive again, but it's unlikely I would do it for enjoyment.

Nevertheless, it's something everyone who is able should do at least once.

Communist Moon

2011-09-16T07:24:00.002+10:00

July 2006 I took a Friday night flight with Jeff Swain, the famous Schofields Friday night 3 circuit musical chairs and dinner. I only vaguely remember it. That was the official start of my NVFR rating. I'm actually surprised it was so long ago. Turned up at the club, got a quick back of the envelope briefing on night circuits from Jeff and off we went with two other pilots, each of us taking a turn in the left seat before making a full stop and switching places until we had all done 3 circuits, retiring to the clubhouse for BBQ chicken. Only the last two years have I been earnest in getting my Night VFR rating to allow me to fly at night. The first 3 years I either had not enough time, not enough money, or not enough of either. Last year I had 6 flight tests booked, and all cancelled due to the uncharacteristically bad weather, La Nina or El Nino, or whatever. This year the weather started to turn in my favour.

I arrived at the club, planned up and ready to visit Cessnock, first taking SFM up for a couple of circuits to get warmed up and familiar. It was more a case of getting use to the cockpit and choosing appropriate power settings for different legs of the circuit. Satisfied, I returned to the clubhouse and cooled my heels a short while, getting my paperwork in order for the flight.

Bill Cooper, the CFI, found me and we went out to the aeroplane, having already filled the tanks and checked the lights were in working order. Not quite dark yet, but almost sun at down we taxied out and headed north to the GA lane, Bill carefully programming the Garmin 430 with our proposed flight plan. Still being light Bill put me under the hood and I flew on instruments until it was obvious I wasn't going to fall out of the sky.

We chatted the light banter of examiner and examined while the sky grew darker and more lights appeared in the suburbs below us, ships off shore decorated like Christmas trees, lines of red taillights snaking their way northwards. The moon hung low on the horizon, haze painting it a vivid scarlet.

The area frequency went silent, suspiciously so. Tuned the CTAF which was also ominously silent. Used both radios and could not hear a squeak out of anyone. Found Cessnock eventually and joined the circuit. Another aeroplane joined after us and made a call, completely relieving my fears of a radio failure.

"One normal landing and one flapless and then we'll head back to Bankstown." A decent circuit and a pretty landing, even if I do say so myself. Power up and round again, the circuit being wide this time as I hadn't accounted for the Nor-Westerly blowing me away from the runway on downwind. Another decent landing, if a little flat, the back we go to Bankstown via Mt McQuoid, Bill Cooper being much relieved of his fears of the likelihood of me balling us both up on the runway at Cessnock. We chatted away again, more naturally now as it was clear my skills were up to par for the NVFR. Held height and heading OK, even if the DI precessed more quickly than you'd expect. Bill at one point mentioned that the engine was performing well, at which point I remarked he was a less superstitious man than I, tempting the fates so.

To Bankstown, and joined a close downwind to land on 29. Thought I had overcooked it and said so, doubting my ability to touch down after the tight circuit entry. Bill had faith and said so, we followed the two red and two white down the slope for another neat landing, even if I have no proof but my own recollection.

I felt confident and very relaxed and I think it reflected in my flying that night. Soft hands and lots of time to think and plan. I'm now qualified to fly at night which will enhance my ability to depart early and arrive late and is also a prerequisite for the flight instructors rating.

We taxied back to parking, the yellow taxi line clearly visible in the bright moonlight, Bill noting we had lost our red moon.

"Communist moon," he said.

Auckland is for Anniversaries

2011-08-08T20:19:00.003+10:00

The wife and I decided to spend our 4th wedding anniversary in Auckland, purely because neither of us had been there before and because we got cheap air fares.

My impressions were generally positive, although I do have a few observations to make.

The Britomart is not a vacuum cleaner store, although exactly what it is, I'm not sure.

I'm also pleased to announce that Grunge is still alive and well on the streets of Auckland.

New Zealand has some unique public insurance scheme that leads to sights like skateboarders rolling down the middle of the busiest street in Auckland. It's almost as if people are daring drivers to run them over in order to be horribly injured and collect the Big One. The town planners of Auckland have also decided that the busiest streets require the least number of lanes. The more popular a street is, the narrower it generally is. Red lights are treated by drivers as merely a suggestion to stop. The little green walking man sign is animated and actually walks, quite jauntily I might add. They also have a countdown timer telling pedestrians how many more seconds they have before the Auckland Formula One recommences, which at first sounds like a great idea, but is actually a bad idea as it encourages people to step on the street at the last possible second. These two traits lead to entertaining interactions, so if you are bored in Auckland on a Sunday afternoon (entirely possible) the best spot for a laugh is a busy intersection. Especially as no one cares about being injured, see insurance above.

Despite appearing to be made of scaffolding and scrap metal, the Hilton is actually finished.

You can't get Smiths Crisps, but you can get Wendys and Carls Jr.

The TV is rubbish, but that's true no matter where you go theses days.

The winter casual dress code for middle aged men is gumboots, stubbies and a woolly jumper.

Roughly half of all restaurants in Auckland are Korean or Japanese.

Enjoyed it. The wife and I want to hire a camper van next time and tour the South Island.

Maple One Six

2011-07-31T00:43:00.002+10:00

Night flying with Jeff, trying to get my NVFR rating sorted prior to the end of winter. Out to Bankstown, planned and preflighted SFA as dusk fell. Head out to the aeroplane, news helicopters hovering overhead, obviously an accident on the M5 slowing everyone down. A stray dog rans past in the darkness, too far and fast for me to track down and disappears between two hangars. Jeff alerts the aerodrome safety officer. We taxi out, picking a gap between evening bank runners. We take off to the east and make right turns, departing the field overhead at 1500 feet. Below us is a river of red tail lights, drivers stuck in the jam, anxious to get moving.
We head north, over Parramatta, following Woodville Rd, Hornsby before the lights of the city disappear behind us and below is just the inky darkness of Broken Bay. There is almost no moon and the only illumination comes from below. The area frequency is alive, a cargo plane has hit a bird, a plover, on take off and and left only small pieces behind. The crew elect to continue to their destination as everything seems normal. They are closer to their destination than their origin anyway. ATC clears a path for them. The crew sound bored by the whole ordeal, though I suspect it's a facade.
We find Swansea and then Cessnock, the circuit full of Cessna 152s. We find a gap in the circuit and line up on final.
"Don't look at the beam," warns Jeff. I look at the beam and make a not so pretty landing. We exit the circuit and head back to Bankstown, leaving the busy Cessnock circuit behind.
Jeff puts me to the test on our way back, tracking the GPS, VOR and NDB, unusual attitudes and random technical questions. He's satisfied with how I do.
We get closer to Sydney and I hear Maple One Six ask for approval to conduct an ILS approach into Kingsford Smith International.
"That's a Hornet," I tell Jeff, who spends the next ten minutes craning his neck, watching the F-18 pass over our shoulders into Sydney. More concerning to me is the 737 which has been sent on an extended downwind leg, right towards us on a reciprocal track. I watch it closely as it passes 500 feet overhead.
Back into Bankstown and I make a circuit too close and put down for another slightly dodgy landing.
I need to work on my landings but apart from that Jeff gives me the OK to go for my NVFR test.

Merimbula and lobster

2011-05-28T20:12:00.008+10:00

My wife and I had planned a trip to Merimbula for some while. I had visited Merimbula aerodrome once before and I was very impressed with what a friendly little set up it was. Rex have regular services there and the terminal building has a nice cafe for visitors.

I had originally booked Archer SFR, but maintenance had necessitated a change to Archer MJT, which is a similar start to my Taree trip story. MJT has no usable GPS receiver, so it was Mark One Eyeball and map to ground, ground to map and ADF navigation. Blue stuff on the left, green stuff on the right, then vice-versa for the return trip. Who said this navigation stuff was difficult?

We fuelled up and prepped MJT, a high pressure system on it's way out giving us warm weather and cloudless skies. We managed to negotitate our way out of Bankstown and headed south, again step climbing underneath Sydney's class C airspace, past Camden, Wedderburn, Wilton and Wollongong up to 6500 feet. Checking that Nowra's airspace was deactivated this Saturday, we broadcast on 118.85 at Kiama, Tomerong, Wandandian and Ulladulla before swtiching back to area frequency. During the week, when Nowra airspace is active, it is necessary to gain clearance from Nowra Control before transitting this VFR lane. Lots of transmissions from Jaspers Brush ALA, ultralights practicing circuits.

South of Ulladulla we flew above a smoke plume from burn offs in the bush. This gave me a perfect idea of what the wind was doing, and told me we were reaching the southern edge of the high pressure system. Further south and parachute ops conducted at Moruya, arranging separation between ourselves, me staying feet wet and the jump pilot feet dry.

I had arranged for the refueller to meet the our arrival in Merimbula before 1400, and I calculated I would make it with 10 minutes to spare. We began our descent and I tried to keep the speed up as much as possible, the conditions being glassy smooth and made a beautiful straight in approach and landing, and I have video evidence to prove if if you don't believe me.

The refueller was there waiting for us, helped us refuel and offered to give us a lift down the road to our accommodation. I tied the aircraft down and we found our comfortable digs. We rested until our booking for dinner at 1830 at Wheelers Restaurant. After a false start in the wrong direction, on the wrong side of the road (hey, what do you know, there's a footpath on this side) we found Wheelers opposite the golf course. Lobsters,oysters and champagne were on the menu to celebrate passing my CPL. I don't remember feeling the cold walking back to the hotel.

Up bright and early the next morning for a leisurely 1100 departure. We caught a cab to the airport, where Colin the Helpful Refueller agreed to meet us to let us in to the airport. Merimbula is the home of the ASIC program and security there is unnecessarily tight. We'd topped off the fuel tanks the day before and we only had to pack up, start up and go. The high pressure system had helpfully moved off to the east so they we could have another headwind on our way back to Bankstown.

We departed north and began our long climb to 5500 feet, negotiating with joy flights off the coast then parachute drops over Moruya once again. Long cruise back, past Ulladulla, Nowra, Wollongong to the edges of the Sydney Basin. An inversion layer was trapping a thick layer of smoke from burn offs around the Sydney area. There were some solid bumps descending through that transition, which certainly got Kirrily's attention. Normal entry and a longish landing for a very welcome return to Bankstown after a tiring trip.

Long overdue part 3

2011-05-26T20:38:00.002+10:00

The previous day I had raced around to Sydney Aviators and arranged to hire HVX, an Arrow II, bumping into an old instructor of mine who is now a First Officer with Jetstar. He gave me some much needed encouragement.

I went around to Schofields to await the ATOs return. As usual they were running late, which only heightened my anxiety as the weak Autumn sunlight was draining into the west. Eventually they returned and I had around an hour to demonstrate to the ATO that I could, actually, land an aeroplane.

Taxied out again, lined up and took off. The aeroplane looked and sounded great, a real throaty thump from the Lycoming 360 and three bladed prop, but for some reason it was not an enthusiatic climber. Never mind, round we go and line up on final. The controller was in a chatty mood and gave witty quips to everyone on the frequency but neglected to give us a landing clearance. Go around and he promises to give us a landing next time. I thank him for his diligence. The aeroplane felt good, the control forces light but it felt sluggish and just a bit sloppy.

Final again and cleared to land. Holding speed very precisely, round out, reduce power, flare and then the aeroplane fell out of the sky, touching down with a pronounced firmness, which is a very kind description.

OK, I thought, that's just a warm up, but it was puzzling nevertheless. The ATO requested a flapless landing but otherwise kept a close and stoic countenance. Same again with 5 knots added and a very similar result. Almost a belly flop in the flare. I couldn't understand what was going on and I honestly thought I had lost the ability to land an aeroplane. Time to give up, chuck it in, tear up my licence and take up gardening.

"You know that airspeed indicator is calibrated in miles per hour," the ATO remarked, casual like. I examined the dial and noticed there were two scales, large miles per hour around the outside and tiny knots on the inner scale. No, I was not aware of that, nor did anyone see fit to mention it to me and this was also the first ASI I had seen so marked. The aeroplane, or should I say airplane, is an American import with an American style ASI. Speed is life and the difference between statute and nautical miles makes a big difference, at least to me.

Now with 15% more speed the Arrow was a lot more sprightly and well behaved, transformed, it bolted into the sky, the controls felt positive and firm. Round we went, holding good speeds and precisely lined up, even if I do say so myself. I put everything I had into this circuit, it was as good as I've ever done and I was rewarded with the sweetest, straightest, softest squeaker of a touchdown I can remember.

"That's more like it," the ATO commented. I felt exuberant, all the stress and anxiety lifted off and wafted away behind us. "Take us back," he said, "I'm happy with that."

Round again and a short field landing, pulling up and exiting within 400M of the threshold.

I finally had my commercial licence, but my day wasn't over. I dropped the ATO off at the clubhouse and taxied back to drop off the aircraft. Unfortunately my way was barred with a crowd of red and blue flashing lights. A jet had reported difficulties and declared an emergency, closing the aerodrome and attracting a gaggle of fire engines, police and ambulance vehicles. Eventually the jet made an uneventful landing, reporting their throttles had frozen, the crew electing to shut down a good engine in flight so they could descend. The single engine landing had looked no different to any other. I taxied back in the dark and handed the aircraft over, relieved, exhausted and went home for a dinner of baked beans and eggs on toast cooked by my congratulatory wife.

Long overdue part 2

2011-05-25T19:38:00.002+10:00

Following the aborted attempt previous, the testing officer and I tried again. The testing officer was a very cool guy who made me feel not like I was being tested at all, but that I was flying with a very experienced acquaintance. A common problem with this arrangement is the tendency to defer to the more experienced crew member. This would be a problem for the test as I was supposed to act as if I was in command so the ATO (authorised testing officer) could test my flying and command abilities. The ATO never made me feel as if anyone other than I were in charge, and all decisions were mine to make.

We departed in tired old LSG again. This aeroplane and I have a long history of not getting along. I had booked SFJ but a serious landing gear problem meant it was unavailable and was out for maintenance for at least six weeks. So it was that I took LSG, a T-tailed Arrow IV out for my most important flight test to date.

We departed on the same flight plan as before, bound for Mittagong, Goulburn, Crookwell and The Oaks and back to Bankstown. The weather was glorious as only an Autumn Sydney day can be, a strong high pressure system over NSW bringing calm winds and a cloudless sky. I couldn't have asked for a better day to do this test. We step climbed south from Sydney underneath the class C airspace of Kingsford-Smith International and levelled off at 6500 feet. Approaching Mittagong low cloud thickened until it was a solid undercast stretching off into the distance. Early fog in the valleys was warming and lifting. I suggested to the ATO that Goulburn was not going to be possible unless we got under the cloud. Dropped the gear and flaps and circled down through a likely looking hole in the cloud. Underneath the cloud there was no defined ceiling as different patches of fog had risen at different rates, leaving long tendrils of cloud hanging from the sky. Getting through that would be hard going indeed, if it was even possible. The ATO suggested we divert to Bathurst so I turned toward the north-west, cleaned up and started to climb up to 5500 feet.

The leg was a good 60 nm, or 30 mins flying time and the ATO chose this moment to pull out a magazine. I don't know if this was an affectation to put me at ease but it certainly helped reduce my workload. We started descending into Bathurst and joined a couple of other aeroplanes in the circuit for a normal landing. Good circuit, good approach and rounded out on final, where I struggled to pull the yoke back to round out and flare. We ballooned and put down for an ugly landing.

The T-tailed design was more a fashion statement by Piper than an aerodynamic improvement, T-tails being fashionable in the seventies along with flared trousers and skivvies. The problem is that the tail is high out of the prop stream, which reduces elevator control authority and makes weight and balance more critical. Coupled to which this particular Arrow has a history of elevator problems and was due for 100 hourly maintenance within the next 5 hours. Does this make me sound like I'm a ham-fisted plumber blaming the aeroplane for my shortcomings? I definitely felt that way after that landing, wondering if I was finding excuses for my own deficiencies. Most pilots flying LSG hold on the electric trim in the flare to help reduce the control pressures but even this didn't seem to help.

We took off again and round for another landing. Same result. My confidence was really getting a battering. A couple more just as bad and I complained to the ATO of the awful condition of the elevator. He took pity on me and asked me to fly to Katoomba ALA. I cleaned up and found the small X of orange dirt on top of the Blue Mountains with steep cliffs at every edge. I demonstrated a precautionary search and landing, fighting the downdraught off the edge of the mountains. We left Katoomba and the ATO put a hood on me to simulate instrument flight. We flew to The Oaks under hood with various instruments covered to simulate a vacuum pump failure. The ATO then took off the hood and asked me to demonstrate stall recovery, unusual attitude recovery and steep turns. He then pulled the throttle back and asked to see a practice forced landing. All this stuff went perfectly. Back to Bankstown we go.

Entered the Bankstown class D and joined the circuit with a Chieftain racing in behind us. For a while it was going to be neck and neck but somehow the controllers sorted it out and we lined up for a landing. Again an awful landing. I was thoroughly pissed off by this stage and once on the ground I showed the ATO what I was talking about. The yoke is attached to a tube which slides in and out of the control panel, pushing the elevator up or down via a series of pulleys, wires and rods. This tube should slide smoothly in and out all the way from fully forward to fully back. This was not the case with LSG. About 3/4 of the way out the tube stuck requiring a good hard pull to free it, at which point it flew all the way back. The ATO agreed this should not be the case. Some combination of worn components, slack adjustment and dry grease was giving me the equivalent of a stuck steering wheel at exactly the point where I needed to hold the elevator to land. The added combination of the T-tail and a forward CG made things worse. We taxied back and I was so gutted I could barely speak.

The ATO was frank and said there was no way he could pass me given what I'd showed him and I couldn't argue. The landings were borderline dangerous. He told me that everything else I had done was perfect, no problems at all and said that if I could show him some good landings some other day he would pass me. He told me he was testing another CPL candidate the following day in a different Arrow. I raced round to find the school with the other non T-tail Arrow and arranged to hire the aircraft from them the following day and that the ATO would test me then.

Long overdue part 1

2011-05-24T08:42:00.004+10:00

Long time between posts, huh?

Apologies for this and some form of explanation is in order. Perhaps some silly superstition on my part, but I have been training for my Commercial Pilot Licence, and posting about it made me feel like I would jinx it or something? Seems a bit unnecessary now it is all over.

I passed.

My commercial flight test had to be completed in 3 stages, for reasons I will now go into.

The test was originally booked for the end of April. I met with the testing officer, who gave me a set of waypoints to fly to south of Sydney and told to get to work. I plotted a flight plan, completed weight and balance, takeoff and landing calculations, fuel plan and got all my cockpit resources sorted and performed a pre-flight inspection of the aircraft in under an hour. The testing officer then quizzed me on my KDRs, which are the bits I got wrong from my CPL theory tests. There are a couple of items which also have to be covered, AOCs, flight and duty time limitations, privileges of the licence and so forth. Then it was time to fly.

The flight is be to conducted as if it was a commercial charter, although as Mike has pointed out, in a commercial charter nowadays there would be a computer prepared flight plan and more reliance on GPS navigation. So it's more like a commercial charter circa 1975. The necessary passenger briefings were delivered and we taxied out to the holding point. All the necessary pre-flight checks were carried out from memory then verified against a written checklist. Takeoff safety briefing given then clearance obtained and line up checks then full power for takeoff. All going very well so far. Unfortunately my favourite Piper Arrow SFJ was unavailable so we had to take LSG instead. She is reluctant to climb, old LSG, for reasons no LAME or pilot can discover. Possibly she's just a tired old girl who needs to go out to pasture. With full fuel and two pax on board we clawed our way into the air at 300-400 feet per minute.

We left the Bankstown control zone and headed south for Mittagong. El Nino still in full swing and the skies were grey and gloomy, occasional showers and a lowish ceiling. The weather was not good, but not so bad as any respectable commercial pilot would cancel the flight. Legal, in other words, so there was nothing for it but to launch and do my best. By the time we got to Bowral it was clear that although we could continue, there was no guarantee we would get home again as rain showers paraded towards us from the Tasman Sea. The testing officer gave me every hint he could that he didn't feel like staying overnight in Goulburn so I turned the bus around and we headed home. Overall very pleased with the flight although pretty disappointed we couldn't get everything finished first time. Back to Bankstown and arranged a retest in 3 weeks time.

Taree not Temora

2011-02-01T22:42:00.009+11:00

Myself and fellow Schofields member Ed Gomes had planned to visit the Temora Aviation Museum in Arrow SFJ but poor weather and necessary maintenance forced a change of plans. Instead we planned to visit Taree in Archer MJT, going via the coastal route northbound and the inland VFR lane back home again.
The weather forecast was still poor on the day of our flight, so Temora was definitely out. An overcast layer at 2500 feet meant we would struggle to get over the ranges to the west but a flight north to Taree and back meant we could stay comfortably below the clouds. In fact we never went above 2500 feet for the duration of the flight.
We preflighted MJT and departed north. MJT does not have a fancy Garmin 430 GPS unit, but it does have a straight airframe, a strong engine and a good prop. Our navigation would be primarily through pilotage so we didn't need any navigation gear more sophisticated than a map and our eyeballs.
We followed the familiar track north out of Sydney over Parramatta, Hornsby and Patonga, then looked ahead up the north coast where the clouds had thinned and it looked far more inviting. Looking down at Brisbane Waters we saw thin white streamers paralleling our track and a quick check of our ground speed confirmed a head wind.

We commenced our short descent to 500 feet approaching Swansea and contacted Willy Delivery for our clearance along the coast through Williamtown airspace, listening to Virgin Blue and Jetstar jets checking in as well. Just as we were approaching Nobbys Head and I was contemplating reminding Willy about my clearance, we were cleared north at 500 feet along the coast, and asked to report approaching Anna Bay. This reporting pointing has replaced Port Stephens Lighthouse although some charts might not reflect it as yet. It's a spectacular run up the coast, as good as Victor One, passing Nobbys Beach which stretches for miles, vertical cliff faces a couple of hundred feet high and laughing at the poor tourists stranded by the high tide on the wrong side of the spit at Port Stephens.

Willy contacted us before we reached Anna Bay and cleared us further north not above 2000 feet, being well north of Williamtown's single east-west runway. They contacted us again before we reached Sugarloaf Point with a "you are leaving controlled airspace, frequency change approved" and we continued north for Taree with a "thanks and good day."
A Rex flight was about to depart as we reached 10nm from Taree. He quizzed us on our location and intentions to ensure deconfliction and was gone before we joined the circuit. A moderate cross wind kept the landing interesting, we backtracked and taxied in to shut down on the apron in front of the Manning River Aero Club. Several weeks of rain, numerous NOTAMs and a large white dumbbell made me dubious of the integrity of the grass parking area and an inspection on foot did nothing to allay my fears. Having received an ok to park on an unused portion of Tarmac we enquired as to a decent spot to grab some lunch.
"Oh, McDonalds is about a kilometre up the road. Or you could try the pub across the road." The pub was duly tried (soft drink only) and we can pronounce the bistro well worth a visit if you ever stop at Taree. Returning to the airport we enquired about purchasing some fuel. We managed to squeeze a few litres of AVGAS out of the CFI we headed west for the inland VFR lane, following the train line south through Gloucester to Maitland.

This portion of the flight is again spectacular, with portions of the flight featuring mountain ranges either side of the lane, on this day almost meeting the gloomy overcast above. The train line snakes and meanders through the valley below, occasionally disappearing inside tunnels, the pilot needing to keep his head out of the cockpit to maintain navigational awareness. To the south the valley widens and the lane near the WMD VOR, which we then used to track all the way back to Brooklyn Bridge, Round Corner, Prospect and home, where Bankstown was waiting for us with an unforecast and hefty crosswind, ATIS reporting an occasional crosswind of 20knots. Our crab angle on final looked from the right hand seat (how do instructors do it?) to be nearly 45 degrees but Ed brought MJT back safely with a lovely crosswind landing in very trying conditions.
The flight from Bankstown to Taree and back is highly recommended as the scenery is awesome and you spend the majority of the time with your head out of the cockpit looking at it. Port MacQuarie is nearby and might be a better place to refuel as the Aero Club at Taree is friendly but always open and they seem to be keen to hoard their fuel supplies. Almost all of the flight is conducted at very low level and you need to be constantly mindful of the consequences of engine trouble. That said it is some of the most visually appealing and fun flying you can find within reach of a single days flying from Bankstown.

ERSA, DAP and AIP

2011-01-30T22:02:00.002+11:00

If you're and Australian pilot you really should check out this website.

http://www.ozrunways.com/site/

It allows you to view runway and approach plates for Australia on an iPhone, iPad or android device, making an electronic flight bag cheaper and more available.

CASA and Air Services are still deciding whether this would be legal and appropriate, and common sense would dictate that you at least keep a paper backup in your flight bag, but I seriously hope they see the light and allow Australian aviators to join the 21st century.

A380 emergency interview

2010-12-29T13:16:00.001+11:00

Courtesy of Fear of Landing (how appropriate) comes a detailed interview of the QF32 emergency.

http://www.aerosocietychannel.com/aerospace-insight/2010/12/exclusive-qantas-qf32-flight-from-the-cockpit/

General Impressions speaking

2010-11-16T00:16:00.007+11:00

I don't like to generalize, but there are some things I noticed that I didn't mention earlier and perhaps some things that need clarification. Firstly, Jetstar. I really didn't enjoy the flight because I firmly believe an A320 is too small for a flight of that duration, particularly when the seat pitch is that narrow. It's totally fine for domestic flights of an hour or two, but unsuited to overwater international flights lasting 4 1/2 hours. I'm as much a fan of cheap flights as the next person but never again would I subject myself to a flight like that. Nor was I the only passenger expressing that opinion on board, surely this must be of concern to Jetstar management? When we booked the flight it was on a A330, but Jetstar subsequently swapped it to an A320 with an inch less seat pitch and non reclinable seats. Treating your customers like this turns them into non repeat customers, and I am pretty easy to please when it comes to airline flying. If I'm confident I will arrive in one piece then I view this as the ultimate deciding factor, Jetstars safety record is hard to fault.

Let's say you moved to Vietnam and decided you wanted to buy a second hand car. One thing you don't have to worry about is the condition of first gear because after observing to local driving style I think you can safely assume first gear has never been used. Despite the fact I never went faster than 50km/ h we spent 95% of that time in fifth gear, occasionally changing down to fourth when stuck in a traffic jam. One thing you should inspect very carefully is the horn which is used almost continually in a kind of honking language that is probably taught in driving schools. A honk can mean I'm here, or I'm overtaking or more frequently to pedestrians get out of my way because I'm not giving way to you. It was explained to me with a straight face that Vietnamese drivers always follow the rules except when they really don't want to. Red lights are generally complied with, unless the driver I'd in a hurry, driving on the correct side of the road is mostly complied with except when the driver thinks the wrong side might be quicker, so you frequently have four, five or six lanes of traffic going both ways alternately on a two way street. Crossing the street itself is an adventure, but so long as you cross confidently and above all predictably the traffic will move behind you. Except for taxis which make a point of aiming straight for you, but I'm pretty used to that in Sydney. I have heard of westerners living for weeks in Vietnam and never crossing a road once, but it's really not that big a deal. Almost everyone owns a motorbike and although the rule is no more than two people per motorbike, the rule doesn't apply to children and is overlooked if the rider has a really good excuse. The strange thing is that it all seems to work pretty well. I was shocked to learn that the annual road toll is in the order 11,000 killed in a country of 85 million. The road toll in Australia is about 500 per annum with a population a bit over 20 million. 4 times the population. 22 times the road toll.

Dog meat, and presumably cat meat, is available for sale in Vietnam. I'm not judging this, merely stating it as a fact. The choice of which animals we name Fido and which animals we serve with chips is largely arbitrary and determined by the cultural norms of the society in which you live. I'm sure there are millions of Muslims who would be disgusted by my love of bacon, plenty of Hindus unimpressed by the popularity of Hamburgers. The vast majority of the worlds population is revolted at the thought of eating Vegemite.

Vietnam Holiday Ten

2010-11-13T22:12:00.003+11:00

Last day and not looking forward to the long journey home. Sleep in late and load up on our last breakfast. We lounge around the hotel room as long as we can, making sure everything is packed. We aren't looking forward to another tortuous Jetstar flight in Amistad class. We check out and ask them to hold our bags while we go have a last cheap meal and look around the town. We make friends with a little black cat tied up outside a small shop. His behaviour says he is friends with the owners of the shop, and privately I hoped he was a family pet. We had been careful to avoid markets where livestock and meat was for sale because on day two our guide had pointed out a dog meat restaurant.
Our lift to Cam Ranh airport arrived just ahead of a large storm building over Nha Trang. Cam Ranh airport was a US airbase during the Vietnam War and was used as a base for Soviet bombers for decades afterwards, but apart from a few blast shields much like those at Darwin airport and there was no trace of its military past. Another thing missing from the airport is anywhere to sit down while waiting for a flight before passing security. The exception was a cafe with exceptionally comfy looking lounge chairs. We sat down and carefully nursed an ice coffee and a fruit juice costing an exorbitant $4 for the hour or so before boarding the flight.
The thunderstorm caught up with us on the flight back to Saigon. We were rocked with turbulence all the way, the seatbelt sign remained on and a woman screamed during a particularly rocky patch. I can't say enough good things about Vietnam Airlines, though, comfortable seats, new aeroplanes, professional crews.
We had a long wait til our flight to Darwin, after a couple of hours we were allowed to check in and passed through security and found a little Japanese restaurant to eat a decent meal, likely our last for 12 hours or so. I was embarrassed to be Australian when a drunk with a twangy nasal accent admitted loudly that he didn't have any money to pay for his beers and food.
After several more hours waiting and having our sealed bottled water confiscated by order of the Australian Government, we jostled the other passengers and steeled ourselves for 4 1/2 hours on the torture bus. Time passed slowly.
Into Darwin and a mysterious 'computer problem' with the airline check in system saw us leave for Sydney over an hour late. Another crawling flight over the empty brown flat central Australian countryside and another 4 hours later we spot our first welcome glimpses of Richmond airbase, Prospect Resevoir and Sydney Harbour. We join downwind and touch down for a slightly sideways landing in Sydney against a stiff swinging crosswind.
We didn't check in any luggage as we were traveling late and do were out at the taxi stand sharply. And I know I am back in Sydney when the cab driver doesn't know where Croydon is.
I haven't calculated how many hours it had been since we left the hotel in Nha Trang but 20 hours would be in the ballpark.
I flopped into my own bed and napped like i desperately needed a nap, which I did. I woke up with that post-holiday feelings of regret mixed with relief.

Vietnam Holiday Nine

2010-11-10T17:36:00.000+11:00

Up early and off to Vin Pearl island amusement park, neglecting our swimmers which we would later regret. We took a taxi out to the cable car and stopped short at an anonymous looking office. In Vietnamese and sign language the taxi driver and a uniformed woman who opened the door and requested 640,000 dong. Which sounds like a lot but is only $32. Still I was dubious but handed over the cash, which was more than we had budgeted for, having relied on the information in the lonely planet guidebook. She handed me two battered electronic cards and closed the door. The driver drove on for the cable car, I settled the $4 cab ride, alighted and watched the cabbie speed off. Still feeling nervous we head for the cable car entrance, inserted the cards into the electronic turnstile and hoped for the best. Lo and behold, a green light. We stepped onto the cable car, refreshingly bereft of safety notices of questionable value and ride to Vin Pearl island. We rode the small rollercoaster but most of the other rides appeared closed. We gazed longingly at the inviting looking waters of the water park then wandered into the aquarium expecting to have to cough up the taxi fare home again. Entry was free and we thoroughly enjoyed looking at the various marine creatures which had mercifully escaped a Nha Trang dinner plate. I must mention that the aquarium is significantly downhill of the cable car exit and the one ride we really wanted to have a go on, the escalator, was shut down also, so we trudged back up the eight flights of stairs to get back where we started from. Back to the hotel again for a quick nap.
I visited the gym again while waiting for a massage, having been firmly convinced of its restorative properties. Feeling refreshed and reinvigorated we went out to dinner at Lanterns and thoroughly enjoyed the meal there.

Vietnam Holiday Eight

2010-11-09T17:49:00.000+11:00

Up early and off to Long Son temple after breakfast. The temple features a larger temple at the foot of the hill, a larger reclining Buddha halfway up the hill, a very large seated Buddha on top of the hill and an appropriate number of touts, beggars and general pests selling junk you don't want and not taking no for an answer. There are nowhere near the number of beggars in Vietnam you see in other poorer countries in south east Asia so it's rather startling to see any at all. It steadily rained as we climbed the hill, then we climbed back down again. I remained quiet and respectful in what I thought was a site dedicated to serenity and spirituality but the locals constantly waving postcards in face and blowing whistles made me wonder why I bothered. We then bravely crossed the road and flagged down a taxi who nearly ran a scooter rider off the road in his haste to pick us up. Using hand signals we directed the driver to the catholic cathedral in Nha Trang. I sat down inside to try and soak up five minutes of calm peace. I'm not sure what broke the spell for me, the gawking Russian tourists off the cruise boat using flash cameras and talking loudly or the ear blasting air horn of the 11 o'clock express to Ho Chi Minh City (the cathedral is located right beside the railway tracks).
We walked back to the hotel through a local market filled with strange fruits and vegetables, as well as various organ meats of unidentified creatures. A person of a more delicate disposition might find the sight of a butcher hacking a torso to pieces on the foot path disconcerting, and might make one less eager to try the local beef soup and stick to steamed rice and bottled water. Myself, I would describe it as enlightening.
Same same but different is a common saying in Vietnam and also the name of the restaurant we visited for lunch. When we arrived in Nha Trang the taxi driver pointed to the large sign above Vinpearl island spelling 'VINPEARL' and said "look, same same Hollywood!". In much the same same way as was the lunch venue same same to the finest restaurants in Australia. The both sell food. Actually the food there was very good and very very cheap. The only problem was the touts who constantly stream in and out selling cigarettes, pictures, postcards and
bootleg books. I bought two books.
Back to the gym to work out again and shoo away two American girls using the bench press as a lounge chair. Out to dinner at La Taverna, run by an Italian guy. Overall the food was great. The only thing I found unpalatable was the mixed deep fried seafood, which included a trio of whole fish, head, eyes, tail and all, battered and deep fried and staring accusingly at me with sightless eyes. Again there are certain lines I do not cross, even in the pursuit of a good meal.
We had been accosted upon entering by the spruikers of three competing bars, each side by side. The Vietnamese definition of competition being to put up an identical business next door and fight for the same customers. Enticed by the offer of two for one cocktails we went inside the blue lit pub while customers streamed in and out not long after. We had our two cocktails, asked for the bill and was unsurprised to find we had been charged for two cocktails anyway. Hampered by the language barrier and too tired to argue we paid our $6 and left.

Vietnam Holiday Seven

2010-11-08T23:01:00.002+11:00

My wifes birthday today, the dawn greeted us with low overcast and driving rain. We don't mind the rain that much anyway. A visit to the Su Spa was on the agenda today. It is reckoned to be the more upmarket of the spas in Nha Trang and although expensive by local standards still incredibly cheap by Australian standards. Kirrilys treatment cost $54 while the same treatment at the Observatory in Sydney would cost $230. I woke up with a bad shoulder, probably by lifting weights which is not something I am used to, so I opted for a hot stone massage and a manicure to stop Kirrily complaining about the state of my nails. I have never had such avrekaxing experience and although my shoulder felt good for a while later in that afternoon it started to feel painful again. I decided that was a good enough excuse for a rest day from working out.
We went to a little local cafe for lunch which cost $6 including tip then we went to pick up some shirts I'd had tailor made earlier in the week, $20 each. I know that if we went to Hoi An we could have got them a bit cheaper, but by my standards $20 for a brand new tailored shirt made to measure shirt, damn cheap.
Out for Kirrilys birthday dinner at the Brewhouse.

Vietnam Holiday Six

2010-11-07T18:38:00.005+11:00

Up a bit late and binges on the buffet breakfast once again. I've eaten more bacon since I've been here than in the six months previous. In my defense Dr Rosemary I spent over an hour in the gym afterwards onthe treadmill and cycling as well as lifting weights. I can bench 100 kgs. Is that good?
Kirrily is feeling a bit unwell. It might be a lot of things, the heat, the aircon, the unfamiliar food, a virus. I have prescribed fluids and bedrest, and I know which order will be complied with. As she is resting I decided to take a stroll along the beach. I never realized how spoiled I am with Australian beaches. Flotsam I can excuse after the heavy rains, but I find it difficult to ignore the discarded plastic bags, bottles, snack wrappers emblazoned in an incomprehensible script, tampon wrappers, tampons, condoms and worse which litter the high tide mark. I have so far found the locals to be very conscious of cleanliness but I can't explain why that attitude ends at the plimsol line.
I headed back to the hotel to check the condition of the spouse, which had improved somewhat and i was further excused to explore the comestibles of the Lousiane Brewhouse. On my way it started raining, coincidentally outside the Sailing Club and so I stepped inside until the rain abated somewhat. Now that I was there, well it would impolite of me not to order an iced coffee Vietnamese style. I finished that and it was still raining, so I thought a cleansing ale was appropriate. Now that a beer was on its way, well how about a bite to eat with which to be washed down.
One coffee, one peppered beef and one Saigon White later I continued my mission. The Louisiane Brewhouse. Again on the beach and not a short leisurely stroll, or determined stagger from the sailing club. They brew their own beer here under an Australian brewer and after just now having imbibed a tasting plate of four different beers I can tell you they are pretty good. A little too hoppy and gassy for my tastes but good nevertheless.
The rain having relented I wandered back to the Novotel, met with Kirrily and found a cheap place, the Paramount, for dinner. $7.50 for two with drinks, not bad. The food was good but the portions very small. I mean I could easily count the number of French fries on the plate. Went back to the hotel after wandering around for a while, Kirrily having looked forward to watching 'Up' and having an early night.
The movie was in Vietnamese. Early night it is.

Vietnam Holiday Five

2010-11-06T18:11:00.000+11:00

Got up nice and early for a jog along the beach. I still feel like I'm on Sydney time here and being close to the equator it gets dark relatively early. Very interesting to see do many locals jogging, doing calisthenics or playing badminton alongside the beach. Passed a platoon of Vietnamese soldiers armed with shovels off to clean up the beach after the fierce storms. Every one of the insisted on shouting hello at me ad try passed with me sweaty and exhausted after a 30 min jog. Back to the hotel to enjoy the buffet breakfast and then an extended session in the pool, rebelling in the decadence of poolside service. Tired by our exertions back to the room for a nap.
My wife has a habit of mistiming her run. We strolled down to the Sailing Club which is almost a Nha Trang institution by now. Opened back in the 90s by an Australian with local help it's an incredibly classy, cheap and laid back beach side pub and a compulsory visit. We started drinking and eating dinner early, 4 o'clock while the staff set up a stage on the beach beside us in preparation for a beach party. Kirrily pointed out we should be getting back to the hotel as it was getting dark, I pointed out it was five thirty. We stayed as I finished my beer, while Kirrily struggled to finish the 'jam jar' of vodka and pineapple juice. Highly recommended, cheap and very strong. Back to the hotel again we passed out for the evening.

Vietnam Holiday Four

2010-11-05T17:10:00.000+11:00

Sleep in and wander the streets for a bit, bought some souvenirs while waiting for our transfer to the airport. Getting there and checking in no problem and have some lunch at the very ordinary airport cafe. Darwin airport is luxurious in comparison. It seems that it is unlucky in Vietnamese culture for a flight to depart from the gate it was originally intended to leave from as every single flight had an announcement advising of a change of gate.
Boarded a bus for a short trip to the airplane, a newish A321. Vietnam Airlines have quite a new fleet, well maintained and well appointed. About half the passengers appeared to be Russians. All I can say is, you can take the peasant out of the potato farm but... One would think they had never been on an airliner with seatbelts before, and the smell of vodka was almost overpowering.
Anyhow we made it to Cam Ranh Bay airport, the Russians clapping and cheering at the landing. Seriously, why do people do that? A sense of relief? Was the outcome of the flight in doubt? If so, I missed that announcement. Maybe the Russians were on to something because we landed long, braked hard and used most of the runway. As we taxied clear I noticed we had landed with a stiff tailwind. Found our lift to the hotel ok, the driver pointing out the recent landslides. The day before we arrived had apparently seen some very heavy rain, 300 mm on one day. The beach was covered in flotsam, the road and beach washed away in places, huge boulders having fallen of the cliffs and reduced the four lane road to one in places. Did I mention this is no impediment to a Vietnamese driver? Driving or riding on the wrong side of the road for extended periods is so de rigeur as to be expected.
Staying at the Novotel which is one of the top hotels in Nha Trang. Fantastic gym, steam room, sauna, room ultra modern, service great. We took the lazy option of the buffet in the hotel restaurant.

Vietnam Holiday Three

2010-11-04T19:14:00.000+11:00

Today's tour was of Nui Dat and Long Tan. The first stop was the village of Phuong Long, I think. It was known cynically as 'VC Village' and it turns out the soldiers cynicism was well placed as the tour guide was a local whose father was VC and the village hid an extensive network of tunnels which mostly remained hidden. We went on to visit the Long Tan memorial, which was quite emotional, and then Nui Dat, or at least what remains of it, which isn't much. Around half the runway remains, many of the roads and some ruined foundations.
Back to Saigon again for dinner at Ngon, which is highly recommended, and was ripped off at the night markets, which is probably compulsory.

Vietnam Holiday Two

2010-11-03T21:02:00.000+11:00

Day two we got up bright and early (earlier than we wanted to due to the time difference) for a tour of the Cu Chi tunnels. You can look up the history behind them if you like, I'm not going to relate that here. I can tell you that it is a theme park version of the Vietnam War, which the locals call the American War, purely to distinguish that conflict from all the other wars that have been going on here pretty much continuously for 150 years or so. I got to crawl down a tunnel, interesting, shoot an M16, cool, look at improvised booby traps, horrifying and watch a grainy black and white video propaganda film. Coming to Vietnam and not seeing the Cu Chi Tunnels would be like going to Paris and not seeing the Eiffel Tower.
Back to Saigon for lunch and then a quick tour of the local landmarks. Passed out asleep from exhaustion after hitting the treadmill and woke up at 11 o'clock grumpy and sore with hunger. Discovered that most restaurants close at 10 o'clock for dinner but got a late bite to eat at the Rex hotel rooftop bar. Fed a stray cat there and went back to our hotel to sleep again.

Vietnam Holiday One

2010-11-02T17:01:00.000+11:00

Day 1 of my holiday in Vietnam. We left a day late because my passport expired less than six months from my departure date Jetstar refused to let us board. I had to apply for an expedited passport renewal from DFAT. This caused us a great deal of anguish and worry as DFAT will only guarantee delivery with 48 hours and I needed mine fr a flight the next day. To their great credit the passport was ready the following morning. Kirrily and I were ecstatic at this news as we thought our holiday would be ruined.
We flew Jetstar to Ho Chi Minh City via Darwin. This was a very cheap flight but let me warn you it us cheap for a reason. We had been switched from an A330 to an A320. Jetstars A320s were designed and built for short hops between Brisbane Melbourne Sydney etc., NOT 4 1/2 hour over water international flights. The seats are close together, bolt upright and not reclinable meaning it is impossible to sleep. Jetstar dont provide outgoing immigration forms or even tell you you are supposed to fill them out at Darwin so there is a mad scramble there. There's nothing to eat at Darwin and you can't take any water through customs even though you bought it in the secure area in Sydney. I was patted down to ensure I didn't have liquids concealed on my person. I felt like emptying my bladder on the guy just to be sure. Basically the flight is a little short of torture and I would never do it again.
But we arrived in Ho Chi Minh City safe and on time which are the most important things, passed through immigration worried they would reject my new passport and send us back and finally made it to the Majestic Hotel in Saigon, exhausted, hot, smelly, dirty and thoroughly pissed off at the world. Off to a great start.

Movember 2010

2010-10-30T08:05:00.008+11:00

It's Movember again, and like I do every year I've donated my upper lip for the cause of mens health.

If you want to support me you can donate my clicking the following link;

http://au.movember.com/mospace/554054 and donate online using your credit card or paypal.

Or write a cheque payable to Movember Foundation, referencing my registration number 554054 and mailing it to;
Movember Foundation
PO Box 292
Prahran
VIC 3181

This year I have decided to grow a pencil mo. I've taken as my inspiration these manly men;

The trick seems to be to shave a little bit under and over the mo to get that defined straight line of a pencil.

Go the Mo!

Last one out turn off the lights

2010-10-25T20:52:00.001+11:00

Fordism. Many people believe Henry Fords greatest contribution to modern economics to be the invention of the assembly line. This is not the case. The assembly line had been in existence for centuries in one shape or another. Even if we narrow our focus to the use of the assembly line for producing automobiles, the credit still goes to a man gloriously named Ransom Olds, who produced Oldsmobiles. It's true that Ford and his team developed and refined the concept making it ever more efficient, but Fords contribution lies elsewhere. His genius, even if he didn't realize it until later, was to pay his workers higher wages than his competitors. In this day and age it seems completely illogical that paying higher wages makes your business more efficient but this is precisely what Ford discovered. He could pick and choose the best mechanics and workers for his factories, and they travelled from across the country specifically to work for him. Those that did manage to secure a position with Ford tended to be motivated and hang on to their jobs for longer, leading to lower turnover. But the most surprising, unintended and important consequence of all was that he paid his workers well enough to afford the products they had themselves made. He created his own loyal customer base.

Contrast this with our modern age and the business concept of outsourcing. Here the business sees employees as a cost base and does everything it can to reduce wages, to the point of only employing overseas workers as long as they are cheaper. The motor industry embraced this concept greedily and whole heartfelt decades ago. The outsourced the manufacturing jobs to robots. Almost everything else was outsourced overseas to places where labour cost one tenth as much as the US. Notably the executive positions were kept in house. End result being those loyal consumers no longer had jobs to pay for the objects being consumed.

Today, Detroit, home of Fords once glorious factories is now no more than a ghost town. It's possibly the worlds first ghost city.

This just in - doctors cause hypertension

2010-08-20T16:25:00.002+10:00

What is it about a doctors surgery that makes my blood pressure rise?

Having recently had my class one medical delayed due to abnormally high blood pressure (151/105) I have been punishing myself with a strict regime of eating foods that are good for hypertension (which I quite enjoyed) denying myself foods bad for hypertension (which I didn't quite enjoyed) measuring myself for weight, waist size and blood pressure (which I kind of liked) and getting at least 30 minutes of daily cardio workout (which I kind of didn't liked at all.)

I was satisified with my progress. According to my own monitor I dropped from 142/107 (eeek!) to 129/75 (normal, could improve that systolic.)

Except when I sit in a doctors surgery, at which point it shoots back up to 150/103.

Fortunately my doctor took pity on me, regarding my normal cholesterol level and diligent notebook recordings and agreed to give me a clean bill of health as long as I agreed to revisit her in two months time.

Which I heartily did.

Smile like in the ads

2010-08-12T11:46:00.002+10:00

I know one day I'm going to drop dead exercising. I shall have a look of supreme disappointment on my face, knowing I died doing what I hated.

A320 simulator ride

2010-07-09T19:51:00.002+10:00

Firstly let me apologise for the lack of posts in recent months. I had a lot of other stuff going on and felt a bit burnt out on the blogging front. Any other bloggers out there can surely sympathise.

Secondly let me thank David Gilmour from Downwind.com.au and Ansett Aviation Training for making this post possible. I can't say enough good things about either.

When I got the email from Downwind.com.au I jumped at the chance to fly a full motion simulator. The last time I flew a full motion simulator was many years ago with the Royal Australian Navy in a Sea King simulator. It was a night only simulator and although the cockpit was an exact replica of a real Sea King and the motion was very realistic, the graphics left a little to be desired. Plus I was sixteen at the time and couldn't fully appreciate the sophistication of the device. Now I'm a licenced pilot and have been studying jet transport aircraft for my ATPL exams, so I held a bit of theoretical knowledge but no practical experience pushing buttons and pulling levers in a real jet. Wild horses could not have prevented me from leaping at the chance to sit in this thing.

I checked my roster and found I wasn't working, which was a good start. The only problem was the simulator centre is in Melbourne and I live in Sydney. Problem quickly overcome by booking a flight down there and the last flight back. Timing it would be tight, but still doable.

I woke up early that day, unable to sleep like some big kid before Christmas, eager with anticipation. My lovely wife Kirrily gave me a lift to the airport and I boarded the VB 737 to Tullamarine. Grabbed a quick bite to eat and grabbed a taxi, the driver laughing when I told him I wanted to go to ... Tullamarine. It was only a short trip, but I gave him a decent tip.

We were greeted at the centre and given a short tour and a quick history. Ansett, of course, was a long lived and well remembered Australian airline before going bankrupt in September 2001. The receivers, rather than selling the simulators at a loss, decided to retain the centre as a unit. It was good that they did this, and eventually a buyer was found and Ansett continues to provide first class training to this day.

By virtue of my needing to make a hasty exit I was given first crack at the A320 along with Jennifer who revealed she had flown the A320 simulator before. She graciously offered the Captains seat.

It has already been pointed out how smug I look, so please don't bother.

But don't I look comfortable there? We started with a takeoff from Tullamarine with Jennifer at the controls and me sitting wide eyed in amazing at all the cool lights and dials. We flew out over the water, tried a stall which the flight computers refuse to allow and had a look at a large storm, gawking at the radar displays before our instructor, Captain Fuller, set up some opposing traffic. A 747, in our 12 o'clock at our level and a reciprocal heading. Even though I knew I was in a simulator I felt uneasy. Soon the TCAS warned us of "TRAFFIC! TRAFFIC!" and uneasy became uneasier. "DESCEND! DESCEND!" it nagged. We climbed. It passed below us by only a couple of hundred feet and I immediately felt more relaxed.

Jennifer took us back for a respectable landing at Tullamarine and passed the controls over to me to takeoff. Power up, stabilise, then all the way to takeoff setting as the noise increased and the box shuddered and shook and tilted back to fool my inner ear into thinking we were accelerated, and very convincing the combination was, too. I found myself way behind the aeroplane, hanging on to keep up, rotated and climbed out of Melbourne. The A320 is a dream to fly, the automation keeps everything trimmed nicely and reduces the workload substantially. My reservations about using the side stick rather than yokes were unfounded, the side stick feels completely natural almost immediately, is very sensitive and rewards the lightest of touches. You quickly stop thinking about how to move the stick and start thinking of what you want the aeroplane to do, and it happens. We made some steep turns, trying to turn the jet upside down and just like the stall protection the flight computers refuse to allow the pilot to push the jet beyond certain parameters. No barrel rolls for us. Next time I might ask for the protection to be switched off. Back into Tullamarine for a touchdown which I was actually rather pleased with before going to Queenstown for a circuit in a howling snowstorm. That was our hour up and it felt like five minutes.

The fidelity is simply amazing and while the graphics still aren't much better than Microsoft Flight Sim X, and in many ways not quite as good, what really makes a difference graphically are the tricky displays which are used. You never get the impression that you are looking at a screen a few feet away. Wide angle collimator displays are used which fool the eye into focusing on infinity and thus objects appear much further away, as they do in reality. Coupled with the realistic cockpit noises, in an actual airliner cockpit, which moves in special ways to fool your inner ear, it is as realistic an experience as I have ever had outside of an actual aeroplane.

I said my goodbyes and rolled out of there as quickly as I could, arriving at the airport in time to see my flight pushing back without me on it. Looks like an overnight stay in Melbourne, at an airport hotel which was a dreadful as it sounds. Nothing could dampen my spirits though, I felt like I was a real sky god, for 30 minutes.

Two days later I sat my final ATPL exam and passed, with an average of 82.5%. I'm told that's a respectable average but I was mostly pleased enough to get them all out of the way.

The Lex - recommended.

2010-04-22T15:43:00.003+10:00

Hop over and say g'day to my mate Lex if you're interested in aviation and such. He has a way with words, and puts my paltry efforts in the shade.

Neptunus Lex

If you're not cheating, you're not trying. That is some excellent advice right there.

There is a VFR reporting point near Bankstown called 2RN, which is also a Sydney radion station, ABC Radio National. A very tall, but very skinny radio tower, 1350 feet high - and the reporting altitude is 1500 feet, so spotting the thing is advisable, lest you bump into it, 150 feet being a scant distance from something that would tear open an aeroplanes belly in a heartbeat. At night it is one miserable strobe among a sea of street lights, car lights, house lights and all the attendant illumination of a modern city. I was doing a night training flight and heading back to Bankstown, my unscrupulous instructor Jeff choosing 2RN as our inbound point. Try as I might I could not see 2RN to save my life, which was becoming truer by the minute. I gave up and confessed my failure to Jeff, whereupon he dialled the radio frequency for Radio National and the ADF needle sprung to it like a pointy thing in a pointing competition. I knew I could do that, I said. Well why didn't you, he not unreasonably asked.

It felt like cheating.

This blog has moved

2010-03-23T17:53:00.001+11:00

This blog is now located at http://chrisparkesonline.blogspot.com/.
You will be automatically redirected in 30 seconds, or you may click here.

For feed subscribers, please update your feed subscriptions to
http://chrisparkesonline.blogspot.com/feeds/posts/default.

FPLA over

2010-03-23T17:46:00.001+11:00

I have finally passed ATPL flight planning. It has consumed the best part of my intellect for the past year and a bit. Thank God it's over.

Mving, brb

2010-01-04T10:21:00.011+11:00

Moving house. If you can't get hold of me, this is why. More later.

Also, if I may give you a word of advice, don't move house over the Christmas period. Trust me on this.

Update - I've moved and it looks like iinet have even retrieved my data! Let me know if anything looks odd.

Update2 - my files finally have the correct permissions! Hopefully I can blog again!

This point is critical

2009-11-28T12:17:00.002+11:00

The critical point (CP,) also called the equi-time point (ETP,) is the point exactly halfway in terms of time.

Let's say you are riding your bike to your friends house 10km away and you ride at about 10km/H. Where is the CP? Commonsense tells you it is at the 5km mark, exactly halfway between your house and your friends house.

Now let's say you are riding in the opposite direction to Grandmas house which is at the top of a big hill, again 10km away. You can ride up the hill at 6km/H, and back at 14km/H. Where is the CP? Not at the 5km mark, because it takes you more time to ride up the hill than down. We need to use the speeds to find a ratio and apply to the distance, thus;

CP = D x Vhome/(Vout+Vhome)

CP = 10 x 14/(6+14)

CP = 7km

To test, we'll see how long it takes us to ride from the CP to our destination, and how long back.

3km / 6kmH = 0.5 * 60 = 30min

7km / 14kmH = 0.5 * 60 = 30min

So here we are, riding to grandmas house, when we remember we have to call mum to let her know we are on our way to grandmas house, do we turn back and let her know, of do we ride on to grandmas house and ring her from there? Up until the 3km/7km mark, if we turn around it will take less then 30min to ride home. After the 3km/7km mark, it will take less then 30min to ride on.

This is similar to the problem that aircraft face in flight when deciding to continue on or return home in response to changed circumstances. In nil wind, the CP is exactly halfway, but if this is any headwind or tailwind (most likely) the CP will move, and it is worth noting it will move into the headwind (uphill.)

We are flying a B727 from Mount Isa to Alice Springs, a distance of 1050NM. Our cruising speed is 450kts TAS, we have a 50kt headwind and we are past the halfway mark with only 500NM to go. A passenger on board has a medical emergency. 500NM ahead of us is Alice Springs hospital and 550NM behind us is Mount Isa hospital and a whole lot of nothing in between. Do we go on or turn back? Alice is closer, but due to the ground speed difference maybe it will take less time to fly back to Isa.

CP = 1050 * 500 / (400+500)

CP = 583NM from Mount Isa (remembering the CP always moves into wind.)
or
CP = 467NM from Alice Springs.

In this case we go back.

To test, let's fly on to Alice from the CP

400/467*60 = 51min
500/583*60 = 51min.

RESULT.

Conventional

2009-11-21T00:42:00.002+11:00

Gratz to Lex who just got the ok to fly taildraggers. I'm glad I got my qual before several thousand hours of tricycle experience made it tougher. Still, he did alright I reckon in that he got the nod after only a few weeks of non-intensive training, an hour here and there, and a false start in an underpowered Champ.

Well done mate.

Point of no return

2009-11-13T21:59:00.003+11:00

The point of no return (PNR) is not just an expression, it has a very real meaning in aviation. The point of no return is the point at which the aircrafts endurance is enough to either go on to our destination or turn back. If we choose to go on, we no longer have sufficient fuel to return to our destination, we have reached the point of no return. On over water legs this is an important point, if there is any emergency, our choice is already made, however suitable it may be to cater to our situation, if the weather at our destination is less than ideal, a decision should be made here whether to attempt an approach or abort and go home.

Let's say we are going from point A to point C, via point B. Point B is exactly in the middle between points A and C and there is no wind. We have only enough fuel to go from A to C and no more. Where would the PNR be? It would be at point B. Point B is halfway, and at point B we would have used exactly half our fuel. Up until we reach point B we can still change our minds and go home. At point B we can go home or we can continue on to our destination. Once we've passed point B we are committed to going on to point C.

Now let's say we have more than enough fuel to go from point A to point C, but not enough to go from point A to point C and back again. This is more usually the case with commercial aircraft. The PNR is somewhere between point B and point C, but where? Confusing the situation is the wind which is a tailwind from A to C, but would be a headwind were we to turn back to A again.

And so we find ourselves at B, needing to know how much further we could fly before we reach the PNR. We have a certain amount of fuel left;

Fuel on board 14000 Kg.

And we can calculate how much fuel will be required to fly back from where we are (B) to home (A.)

Fuel required to fly back to A from B 4000 Kg

We do this and subtract it from the fuel we have on board, whatever is left over is the amount of fuel we have available to fly out to the PNR and back to B.

14000 - 4000 = 10000 Kg

If the wind was nil, we could divide by the SGR to find how many miles we could fly using this fuel, halve the distance and we would have our answer. Or to put it another way, divide by twice the SGR, the SGR out being the same as the SGR back. This is the heart of the problem - wind and different aircraft configurations mean that the SGR out is almost never the same as the SGR back. But the equation is still the same;

Fuel at B after fuel back to A is subtracted;

10000Kg

Divided by SGRout + SGRhome;

10000 / (8.5 + 10.7) = 520nm

EDIT - It's been pointed out that I didn't explain what SGR means. The SGR is the specific ground ratio, or the amount of fuel used per distance of ground covered, and varies by fuel flow, airspeed and head/tail wind. In this case the SGR is KG of fuel used per ground NM covered. The B727 conveniently averages 10 KG per NM on average in cruise configuration. A headwind increases the SGR, increasing the amount of fuel used per NM, while a tailwind decreases it.

Flight planning - headwind/tailwind

2009-11-09T20:39:00.004+11:00

I'm studying for my ATPL and I am stuck on flight planning. In fact I've been stuck on this one subject for almost a year. For my own edification, I'm going to describe some typical AFPA (ATPL Flight Planning Aeroplane) questions, and their solutions, so I can study wherever I happen to have internet access. Perhaps some more erudite and learned ATPL pilots can happen along and give me some pointers, too.

Maximum headwind/minimum tailwind.

When flying from place to place you need to ensure that you land with a minimum amount of fuel necessary to cover emergencies. That fuel is called reserve fuel, and may not be used, except in an emergency. Using your reserves alone constitutes an emergency.

Say that I am flying a B727-200LR from point B to point C, with point A a long way behind me, and point C still a ways to go. I've already burnt up a fair bit of fuel getting here and I need to ensure that I don't touch my reserve fuel getting to point C. Aloft I can have a headwind, a tailwind, or no wind at all (unlikely.) If the headwind is sufficiently strong I may get nowhere at all.

If I am 450nm from my destination and I have 7000Kg of fuel aboard, 3000Kg of which is reserve fuel, how strong a headwind can I accept at point B and be reasonable confident of getting to point C without using my reserves? I will ignore the descent and approach for the pourposes of this problem.

Firstly, let's see how much fuel I can burn getting to point C.

7000-3000 = 4000Kg of fuel. This is my flight fuel or fuel burn off (FBO,) the amount of fuel I can use getting to point C without using my reserves.

SGR = FBO/dist. The distance to go is 450nm. 4000/450 = 8.889 This is my SGR(required) This is the most Kg of fuel per nm I can burn. If my fuel economy is worse than this, no good.

Another way of calculating SGR = Fuel flow per hour/ground speed in kts. I calculate my fuel flow from the B727 flight manual in this configuration as being 3600Kg/H.

8.889 = 3600/Gs , or Ground speed = 3600/8.889 = 404kts.

I calculate my True Air Speed (TAS) in this configuration, which is 436kts.

My Gs(req)-TAS = my allowable head/tailwind.

404 - 436 = -32 Kts. This is the maximum headwind I can accept. A positive number would indicate a tailwind is required.

I'll test this by giving myself another 2000Kg of fuel onboard to use. If my reasoning is correct, then the answer should give me a much greater accepatable headwind.

6000/450 = 13.334 SGR(req)
3600/13.334 = 269kts Gs
269 - 436 = -167 kts allowable headwind.

Let's try it the other way with less fuel. If I have less fuel to cover the same distance, then logic tells me I need less headwind, maybe even a tailwind helping me along, to get me where I am going without eating into reserves.

2000/450 = 4.445 SGR(req)
3600/4.445 = 809kts Gs
809 - 436 = 373kts tailwind required.

RESULT.

Mo Money

2009-11-06T21:44:00.002+11:00

It's Movember, and I am once again growing a dubious tache for charity.

Frightening, hmmm?

Here is the sales pitch;

Hi,
I am growing a moustache this year for Movember. I have decided to put down my razor for one month (November) and help raise awareness and funds for men's health - specifically prostate cancer and depression in men.
What many people don't appreciate is that close to 3,000 men die of prostate cancer each year in Australia and one in eight men will experience depression in their lifetime - many of whom don't seek help. Facts like these have convinced me I should get involved and I am hoping that you will support me.
To sponsor my Mo, you can either:
* Click this link http://au.movember.com/mospace/121975/ and donate online using your credit card or PayPal account
* Write a cheque payable to 'Movember Foundation', referencing my Registration Number 121975 and mailing it to: Movember Foundation, PO Box 292, Prahran, VIC, 3181
Remember, all donations over $2 are tax deductible.
Movember is now in its sixth year and, to date, has achieved some pretty amazing results by working alongside The Prostate Cancer Foundation (PCFA) and beyondblue: the national depression initiative. Check out further details at: http://au.movemberfoundation.com/research-and-programs.
If you are interested in following the progress of my Mo, click here http://au.movember.com/mospace/121975/. Also, http://au.movember.com has heaps of useful information.
Thank you

Flying post overdue

2009-10-30T20:50:00.004+11:00

A couple of weeks ago I took a flight to Taree with a pilot mate named Julien, whose blog you can find here. I'd been wanting to fly along the coast past Taree and back through the VFR lane for quite a while, but didn't want to do it alone, so when Julien posted on his blog that his attempt was thwarted by bad weather, I suggested we fly up together. He was PIC for the first leg, and I would be PIC for the return leg.

The weather in Sydney had been crappy for days leading up to our flight, either heavy rain or high winds, and sometimes both, but the trim Gods smiled on us and we got a window of good weather for about 12 hours on the day of our flight.

I like flying with new people, they usually have tips and tricks to pass on, and interesting tales to tell. Julien was a good choice, he is an accomplished pilot and I could tell he was a thorough planner, very organised, particular about details, all things which in almost any other endeavour would be viewed sceptically, but which are welcome attributes in an aviator. I'd happily fly with this bloke again. Julien is also pedantic about following the rules, which is something I tend to get lazy with.

We left Sydney early enough, but weren't rushed at all. No time was wasted and at no time did I feel we were in a hurry. I sat in the right seat to take these pictures. Although we had agreed on our respective roles I initially found myself handing out unnecessary advice and touching switches without asking. Naughty! In the run up bay I apologised and promised to behave myself like a good co-pilot should.

We rapidly left Sydney behind and headed north to Newcastle, still an important coal port as these waiting ships demonstrate.

There aren't too many tall buildings in Newcastle.

The shipwreck of the Sygna off Stockton Beach, an unmistakable landmark.

Ummm Broughton Island I think. My photo really does not capture its striking grandeur. The best way to see it is to barrel past at 500 feet.

Not much further north of this I saw something I hadn't seen before. A small high wing aircraft was circling low of the water. While I watched a dark whale as big as a bus broached the surface and splashed back into the waves. Sadly it was too distant and fleeting to get a photo, and Julien was on the wrong side of the aeroplane and never saw a thing.

Scenic Taree airport.

We refuelled at Taree, we didn't need to but I wanted to get an accurate idea of our real world fuel consumption. The Chief Pilot at The Manning River Aero Club had the appropriate surname of Sky, and picked it without even opening the tanks. "Forty litres per hour" he said, and he was spot on, we flew for 87 minutes and used 57 litres. 40L/H is an appropriate planning fuel consumption figure for unleaned cruise. Schofields operations manual prohibit leaning the mixture below 5000 feet AMSL. Avgas is cheap when compared to a engine ruined by an overleaned mixture. The Manning River Aero Club is a very nice example of a country flying club, very comfy and homey with a fire that must be inviting during winter.

I enjoyed sitting in the right hand seat, just watching, talking on the radio and concentrating on navigating, but I was also happy enough to be back in seat 0A.

The VFR lane is narrow and follows a railway line up a winding valley which at times is quite tight.

Williamtown military airspace is normally active above it during the week at 1000 feel amsl, and lots of the surrounding terrain is higher than that, so there isn't much space vertically either, and you have to fly low to stay legal.

After the lane it was fairly straight back to Bankstown over familiar terrain. Julien captured the landing, unfortunately a dying camera battery prevented me from doing the same for him. He was complimentary of my landing, which just goes to show how polite he is.

Lets see that from another angle

2009-10-21T21:05:00.002+11:00

A forced landing at Bankstown airport on the 6th June 2009 captured by not one, but two cameras.

He comes down at an angle and then straightens up just before touchdown. Aircraft in one piece, passengers unhurt. Eyewitnesses say that the reason for the bank on coming in was to avoid the warehouses on the north side of the field, something Bankstown pilots have been warning about for a while now.

Bye Buddy

2009-10-01T15:29:00.003+10:00

Yesterday around this time my wife and I said goodbye to Houston, our beloved cat, just shy of his 13th birthday.

He was my little buddy, he followed me around the house wanting to know what I was doing all day, he slept like only a cat truly can until he got hungry, then got up and ate til he was tired. He demanded to go outside just to sleep in the sun and sniff the grass, he demanded to be fed at 0545 every day. He curled up beside me to sleep just about every night.

And when he no longer wanted to do any of those things because he was too sick, he knew we would do what was best for him.

And we did, while we held him and the light went out of his eyes.

My wife has said it better than I ever could;

To others he may have just been a cat, or our pet. But to us he was our family and we loved him.

Houston, we have a problem.

2009-09-26T19:33:00.003+10:00

I'm not even sure how to start this post.

People close to me and my wife know how close we are to our family cat, Houston. People who know how close we are will know how upset we were when he was diagnosed with cancer recently. We've been blogging our experiences as a way of coping and possibly to help anyone else out there whose beloved family pet is also diagnosed with a terminal illness. You can read how it has gone so far here.

We recently took him back to the vet to be checked up and got the news that we both knew was possible, but didn't think we would get. The treatment wasn't working, and now instead of having weeks or months of life left, he has only a matter of days before the pain and illness becomes intolerable. It was a terrible shock to us because he had been doing very well. So well in fact that the vet recommended his dosage be cut down. I now wonder if that was a mistake. Nevertheless, I'm convinced the treatment he received extended his life and that we would already be dead without it.

Anyone who has or had a family pet that they love, for thirteen years in our case, could understand just how painful this is for us. He is the closest we have to a child, and soon he will need us to do the right thing, which is end his life before it becomes too much to bear.

I don't know how to end this post.

Wolfie 2

2009-08-25T17:42:00.005+10:00

Photos taken in Bicentennial Park and Newington Armoury by my lovely wife Kirrily.

More nightness

2009-06-14T17:29:00.003+10:00

Another night session at Bankstown.

Julien commented on one of my recent posts - he happened to attend the same session of night circuits as myself a few weeks ago. We didn't fly together, but G'day Julien if you're reading this. I'll be reading your blog with interest in the future.

Daniel Martin was our instructor for the session, a very experienced and agreeably laid back instructor at Schofields. Grahame Smith and Dave Roberts were my fellow acolytes. Grahame took us out to show us how it was done, and really gave us something to aim for. Grahame never got around to completing his night VFR rating, but is an experienced IFR pilot and it showed in his precise speed control and effective instrument scan. He took it round for three good circuits, copping a nasty patch of slipstream for an Archer in front of us. It threw the aircraft off at least 30 degrees angle of bank shortly after take off and really got our attention. Landed, taxi back and shut down.

Now my turn. Took it around for one good circuit and a squeaker of a landing. Normally this would be a good thing, but I would rather have my landings be a little on the firm side at night, rather than grope around in the flare and float too high. The next circuit was ok and the landing this time was firm, but rather too hard. A Duchess was on its way into the circuit and the tower requested we extend out downwind leg to accommodate it. I choose to turn too early, thinking a Duchess would be a bit faster than our Warrior. Pilots who have flown a Duchess may choose to chuckle at my expense at this point. I also didn't twig to the transmission that preceded, advising the Duchess to slow to follow a Liberty. We ended up going too close behind, and being asked to go around. It's a good thing to get to practice a go around at night, I rationalised. The last circuit was good up until it was my time to receive a fright.

On late final we encountered wake turbulence as Grahame had earlier. And there's no wake turbulence quite like wake turbulence at 100 feet. The left wing dropped past 30 degrees and I put in a boot full of right rudder to pick it up. It wasn't done with us though and we dropped first the left and then the right wing during the flare, probably no more than 10 feet off the ground. The landing was surprisingly good, taxi back and shutdown to allow Dave to have a go and for my heart rate to retrun to normal. Dan speculated that because the night was so still and calm, wake turbulence was hanging around for longer rather than being broken up by passing currents as it would during the day. Another good lesson there, campers.

Unfortunately as Dave is a pre-solo student we weren't permitted to be on board while he flew the circuit, so Grahame and I waved him good night and wandered back to the clubhouse, which was a decidedly warmer place to be.

The Heartland of Choad

2009-06-09T21:13:00.002+10:00

Eastern Europe. The New New Jersey.

This post no good without pics

2009-06-09T10:59:00.002+10:00

Flew again last Friday 29th May. Took a workmate Brett along for the ride. Apologies for the tardiness of this post, but I was expecting to get some photos from my passenger to post, who has since told me the battery in his camera died and so he can't yet retrieve the images from it. Brett's father was a flight engineer for QANTAS for many years, and grew up near the northern beaches of Sydney, where a great many QANTAS flight crew seem to reside, so I took a route I've flown a few times before that goes as close to Sydney Harbour whilst remaining outside controlled airspace.

The weather had been poor for several weeks leading up to the flight, the confluence of low and high pressure systems off the coast brought day after day of heavy rain, flooding and low cloud. The day of the flight, though, was nice and clear, some cloud but not enough to effect the flight. The aircraft, SFA, had not been flown since the 17th, and a fuel drain revealed it had soaked up a fair bit of water. I had never seen quite so much water in a fuel tank, I must have rocked and drained the tanks a dozen times each before they came up clear of water.

Startup, taxi out, extended run up on both tanks to make sure they weren't going to quit with water contamination after takeoff and out to the runway. A few months earlier a Chieftain had run off the end of the runway after a failed aborted takeoff, the report blaming water contamination for the loss of engine power.

North via the VFR lane to Hornsby, then east to the coast north of Long Reef, one orbit over the beach, but clearly too cold for naked sunbathers, then north to Barrenjoey Head lighthouse, west to Brooklyn Bridge, then south back the VFR return lane to Bankstown. Encountered a couple of minor showers along the way back, prompting my passenger to ask what I used to keep the windscreen clear of water.

'Airspeed,' I replied.

Into the circuit at Bankstown, too close behind another Archer in front prompted a 'waggle your wings SFA' request so the tower could differentiate us, then having to go around. I thought we had sufficient spacing, but the tower controllers were handing over, I think the new controller was erring on the side of caution until he had a handle on the circuit traffic.

Around we go again, on short final my passenger started asking questions about the layout of the field, which I tried to answer, but probably shouldn't have. My fault for not briefing him to stay quiet during our approach and landing.

A nice, fun flight, and easily done within the 1.5 hour booking we had.

And another one, this time with nightness

2009-05-10T03:26:00.002+10:00

Out to the club again, for our regular night flying event, in which we take turns to fly some night circuits. It's a great night, and good fun all round. The general idea is three club members and an instructor take a club aircraft out, each club member taking it in turns to make three night landings before switching seats with another club member, and so on. We switch seats on the ground, of course. This satisfies our recency requirements for legal reasons, the club puts on a dinner and so it becomes a social event, too.

I was a bit nervous before I went out that I wouldn't remember everything, but it all felt very natural, although my instrument scan was slow and haphazard, which I will work on.

Finally, a new flying post

2009-05-06T17:44:00.003+10:00

At Bankstown again today, just to fly some practice circuits for the recency and proficiency that's in it. It took some cajoling at the front counter to establish my credentials.

"Who's your instructor?"

I don't have an instructor. I have a licence.

"When was you last flight review? It's not within the last year."

Yes, I know, but it is within the last two. That's why it used to be called a biannual flight review. I glads they changed the name to make it less clear.

"The computer says your medical has expired."

Well, my class one medical expired, but my class two medical lasts for another three years. And anyway, I've since renewed it and got the paperwork back.

And so, eventually, almost reluctantly, I got the keys to my favourite Archer, SFA. Preflight, nothing out of the ordinary, a few stray nicks on the prop that will need attention before too long.

Startup, SFA is a bit quirky on starting up, she always needs three pumps on the prime to turn over, but she won't start on the first crank. Prime again and she fires almost straight away after cranking again. The first time I ever flew SFA, I picked it up at the mechanics, taking two passengers for a harbour scenic. The previous Archers I had started did not even need a prime, just a quick boost with the fuel pump and away they went. When that did not work, I primed. She didn't start. I rang the club and Nelson advised me to prime and try again. She fired straight away. Now that I know this quirk, I feel more comfortable with this aeroplane. She is my club favourite.

Taxi out, and trapped behind a C152 with two white shirted, epauletted pilots aboard. A CPL student and instructor, or two CPL students, or two student instructors, and clearly in no hurry to get out to the runway. I have no problem with people who taxi slowly, taxiing too fast is a bad habit I have picked up from impatient instructors. Nevertheless, I idle the engine the whole way and have to drag the brakes to keep from chewing up their rudder. All the way around the airport from the northern to the southern side, which is the training runway.

Run up, the engine is well warm from our extended taxi run, instruments ok, carb heat works, magnetos ok, idle ok, cockpit checks complete, controls full free and correct, hatches and harnesses all secure. My C152 roadblock is beside me and I manage to get to the holding point before them.

I hold, then cleared to line up, and then cleared to take off. Lights on, heels on the floor to avoid dragging the brakes, power up, check the oil pressure is fine, airspeed indicator alive and rising, maintain centreline with rudder. 65 knots and lift the nose wheel, the Archer rises of its own accord, leaving the runway behind.

I am told the preceding traffic is a Cherokee on a very wide downwind leg. This is tower controller talk for I am getting frustrated with the pilot of this Cherokee and I am going to let everyone know what I think of their flying skills. He is right, the aeroplane in front of me is 2-3 times further out than it should be. I drift out as well, it will be difficult for me to stay behind it otherwise. I drop some stages of flap to slow down. It turns base after a very long downwind, pushing me out to avoid cutting it off, lines up on final and receives a call clearing it to land. No reply, the tower tries twice more without acknowledgement. The pilot lands anyway, but I have to go around, then request and am cleared to make an early crosswind turn back into the circuit. I hear the tower ask the pilot for a radio check, the pilot says she reads him 4. The tower asks why she did not acknowledge the previous transmissions. We must have been talking she says.

This sets the tone for the following 1.2 hours. I am constantly throttling back and dropping stages of flap to avoid running too close behind other aircraft. I go around three times. I am cleared to land when I am about 50 feet above the ground on the verge of going around. Consequently my landings are safe, but not things of beauty. My second last landing is a big bounce. I realise I am still flying, so I pour the coals on and call it a day. I request the northern runway to shorten my trip back to the club, and I am denied - it is just too busy. The Cherokee landing in front of me lands, then detours sideways, narrowly avoiding running onto the grass, saving it at the last moment. There is no wind to speak of.

My last landing is a good one, a nice little squeaker, although I carried a bit too much speed and miss the first taxiway. I take the second, and unfortunately the C152 behind me has to go around. Sorry dude, but welcome to my world. I hold and wait to cross the centre runway. A C152 in motors down the centre runway, practising aborted takeoffs. After it passes I am cleared to cross the centre runway but hold short of the northern runway. Another C152 lands on this runway and takes the exit in front of me. I am cleared to cross the runway behind the C152 and expedite. Expedite means do it now, without delay, make it fast. I see an aeroplane is lined up on this runway, waiting to take off. Unfortunately the C152 in front of me is taking his time exiting the runway and has decided to go way to another aeroplane taxiing in front of him. I briefly entertain the notion of reminding the pilot that aircraft exiting runways have right of way, and that he is holding the whole show up, but I don't, the tower can see the whole thing.

I taxi back to the club, behind the dawdling C152, the two pilots hanging their elbows out the open windows as if on a Sunday drive. I idle the engine again, and drag the brakes.

I park, shutdown and secure the aircraft.

Thus ends a very frustrating training session at Bankstown airport. It's getting so that the only days I can train out here are days with a stiff crosswind or a damp runway, when everyone else is forbidden to come out and fly, lest they bend the school's favourite C152. On the plus side, I didn't seem to have forgotten anything, I view it as a positive that flying daytime circuits is a waste of time for me - I need to get out and about and get some cross country flying under my belt again.

Are you Chris Parkes?

2009-05-02T01:58:00.002+10:00

When I came in to work tonight there was an email waiting for me, addressed to Chris Parkes, informing me that I was responsible for the executive summary of some project I had not the faintest clue about. Of course, it wasn't for me, it was Chris Parkes who lives in Ireland, works for HP and sometimes gets my emails, as I get his.

A few years ago, I saw a show called 'Are You Dave Gorman?' in which Dave Gorman travelled around the world meeting as many people with the same name as his to establish whether or not Dave Gorman is a common name.

I've often wanted to do the same. Google you own name, if you haven't already, and you are likely to find a strange collection of individuals with your name. Some of mine are fascinating. Nuclear physicists, Reiki healers, butlers, football managers, sound engineers. Chris Parkes really is a fascinating fellow. I hope to meet him one day.

Fast Finger Freddy strikes again

2009-04-30T16:23:00.003+10:00

Wrong computer numbers caused Emirates jet to almost crash at Melbourne Airport

Tail Strike -A6-ERG, Airbus A340-500, Melbourne Airport, VIC, 20 March 2009

I didn't initially realise just how serious this incident was. According to the preliminary report the aircraft didn't actually start climbing until 300 metres past the end of the runway, taking out a strobe light and two radio transmitters along the way.

Systems failure, not people failure

2009-04-17T01:44:00.002+10:00

Triple-0 sarcasm a 'disease'

This is a tragic case, and I don't presume to know all of the technical details, but I can see a parallel with many tragic aviation incidents. There were many factors that lead to the death of David Ireland, but I am of the opinion that the attitude of the 000 operators was just a link in the chain of events, rather than the root cause.

Firstly, the majority of 000 calls are dealt with professionally and effectively - these calls were not. Why?

I would hazard a guess that the prank or hoax calls that 000 receives must make the operators cynical whenever they receive a call which is out of the ordinary and for which details are scant, which is certainly the case here. The caller was on a mobile, in the middle of nowhere, not knowing where he was, cutting off calls abruptly when his signal dropped out, shouting to make himself heard - all behaviours which might make an operator think 'prank.'

The operators are city based, and in an urban setting it is easy to forget that out in the bush, services, streets, all sorts of 'normal' facilities simply don't exist. I fly into many country airports where there is no pay phone, no internet, no radio or phone reception, no nothing. The city based air traffic controllers can be a little sarcastic when you try and lodge a flight plan in the air or get some met info, simply because they forget that some places still exist without curb guttering and coffee shopes every ten feet.

Judging for the article the operators follow a script of sorts, inputting information into a computer system which allows them to communicate the relevant details to the emergency services. Where the system fell down was where they had received a call where none of the information matched that allowable by the computer system. As far as it was concerned there was no emergency. Furthermore the information they collected did not get to the search parties quickly enough, because there is an unspecified impediment to emailing it, it had to be printed and presumably delivered to where it wss needed by hand.

He agreed the behaviour of three operators was worthy of an internal investigation and possible action. Two operators had been "counselled" about their behaviour.

This is dodging the issue. I can only imagine the guilt these operators feel, admonishing them is unlikely to fix the problem now or in the future. All blaming the operators is likely to do is make the guy at the top look like he is taking action. Until the inherent failings in the system are acknowledged and corrected all that will do is delay the inevitable - history repeating itself.

The Easter Bunny meets an unfortunate end.

2009-04-13T14:48:00.003+10:00

I have some bad news, kids. The Easter Bunny went to visit Santa Claus and, uh, well...

Pilot found guilty, all other parties try to look innocent

2009-04-08T19:59:00.003+10:00

Despair as Garuda pilot gets two years

I'm not a lawyer, so I'm not going to get into the appropriateness of the sentence or anything else, but I'm personally of the opinion that justice was not fully served and that aviation in Indonesia is not substantially any safer than before the Garuda incident.

My reasoning is that aviation accidents rarely, if ever, have a sole cause. This incident is no different. The poor decision making of the pilot was merely one link in the chain of events, one more hole in a slice of swiss cheese that resulted in the deaths of 21 people.

Where, for example, were the aerodrome operators, the airline executives, the regulators who were, in some way, also culpable for the incident?

AE-2007-015: Boeing 737-497, PK-GZC; Adi Sucipto Airport, Yogyakarta, Indonesia; 7 March 2007

The aircraft exceeded its speed limit of 250 knots below 10,000 feet, air traffic control either had no way of identifying this, or chose to do nothing.

The 1st officer did not appear to have been given the required simulator checks by the airline.

The regulator, the DGCA, had only conducted two safety audits of the airline during the previous ten year period. Most general aviation flying schools in Australia get audited more regularly than that, usually once a year.

The fire-fighting units were dispatched to to the crash site, only to find themselves trapped behind an airport perimeter fence 130 metres away. The fire-fighting units themselves did not comply with ICAO recommendations, and even if they had been able to get past the fence, were ill-equipped to perform the task required of them.

Garuda took 33 hours to provide the cargo manifest to authorities - so long, in fact, that it negated the whole point of providing it in the first place.

The runway itself did not meet ICAO standards, and the DGCA had failed to notify the ICAO of this difference.

The flight data recorder did not record all of the parameters it was required to record, as the unit was a digital unit, and unable to record the analogue input.

Pilot guilty, but is flying in Indonesia any safer?

The answer appears to be a little, but not much. The EU has still banned Indonesian airlines from flying in EU airspace, a step Australia appears unwilling to take, probably due to political considerations.

The conclusion that I draw from all of this is; until a blame culture is overcome, until there is a willingness to acknowledge inadequacies, the system cannot be substantially improved. This is true of all organisations, in all fields. Burying ones head in the sand and ignoring criticism only delays the inevitable.

The was pilot error involved in this incident - but the root causes went much deeper.

Who are what now?

2009-03-29T14:31:00.002+11:00

Many years ago, in a seemingly more innocent and happy age, back in about 2000 or so, I worked in a building with an elevator in it. I still work in a building with an elevator in it, in fact three elevators, but it's a different building now and this really isn't the story I'm trying to relate now, so let's try not to get sidetracked.

The building I was in had an elevator, I think I mentioned that. One day I took the elevator to the balcony level to partake of a cigarette and noticed something strange scrawled on the inside of the elevator doors.

The inside of the elevators were painted black making a rather effective chalkboard, of which someone had taken the advantage to use as same. Scrawled in white chalk on the inside of the elevator doors in a rather workmanlike script;

"Tuners are cats."

I pointed this out to my workmate Glen, who was as equalled puzzled as I as to the meaning of the phrase. There was insufficient space between the doors for a hand to reach in and scrawl a coherent sentence. It must have been done before the doors were installed, or perhaps during maintenance. But what did it mean?

I have a couple of theories as to the significance of this communication, but today I invoke the great hive mind of teh intartubes - what does 'Tuners are cats' mean?

Nice, but it could do with a slap of crimson.

2009-03-24T15:22:00.003+11:00

I've been interested in the Roman Empire since I was in high school. I'm not quite sure why this is, what triggered my interest in this particular era of ancient history, but there you are. Perhaps it was a childhood visit to the Roxy Cinema in Nowra where I grew up, built in the art deco syle in the 30's and decorated in a gaudy Roman amphitheatre style, with fake colonnades and carvings of cherubs and gladiators.

Down at the front, though, beside the screen stood an enormous reproduction of a statue of Augustus Caesar. It was about the only decoration in the place not painted in gaudy colours and fake gold. How wrong they were, and how wrong are these.

If you've long admired Greek and Roman sculpture, then I suggest you DO NOT click on these links. If you do then I hope you have a strong gag reflex.

Top 10 Color Classical Reproductions

The ancients: now available in colour

Missing - inaction

2009-03-23T23:36:00.005+11:00

Have I expressed how deeply unimpressed I have become with the performance of the NSW Police over the last few years?

I can give you a number of anecdotal examples of lack of commitment on the part of individual officers I have had involvement with, and witnessed, from the Police Sergeant who thought himself too important to leave his desk to witness some documents I was required by law to have certified by a Police Sergeant, to police vehicles obviously ignoring other vehicles flagrantly breaking the road rules. I'm so used to the last one, I've found myself more and more ignoring road rules when I find them inconvenient, and I don't think I'm alone.

Bikie killed in Sydney Airport brawl

It's bad enough that this occurred, but the implications are quite staggering. The brawl apparently went on for 15 minutes - no NSW Police even witnessed the event, they had to be alerted by a 000 call. According to the Premier, the initial call to 000 came in at 13:43, and the call to the airport police commander went out at 13:46 and police responded at 13:47. This is calculated to be a response time of less than one minute (my high school maths says it is between 3 and 4 minutes, but whatever.) It was presentedtestified in court that the fight actually started at 13:35 - in other words, a number of huge, possibly armed men brawled unimpeded through the airport, and not a single NSW Police officer noticed. NSW Police were totally unaware until 8 minutes later, when a member of the public placed a 000 call.

Try taking an overly large bottle of shampoo, or a set of nail clippers on your next flight and see how far you get. A brawl involving up to 20 people and ending with 1 person bludgeoned to death, walk right in. It's quite clear the the low grade harassment, inconvenience and expensive equipment is merely to provide a veneer of security, the illusion of safety. Walk into Heathrow, for example, and you will be able to see police officers walking around armed with sub machine guns, and this is in a country which generally doesn't see the need to arm it's constabulary with firearms at all. The authorities there clearly see the need for a different response at its primary airport. Walk into Sydney airport and the most you will see will be a private security guard armed with a walkie talkie. You will find a more effective policing model at your nearest Westfield shopping centre.

The response so far has been to propose introducing new laws, giving greater powers of covert search to the Police and allowing them to arbitrarily declare a club or organisation as being illegal, and the members commit a crime simply by attending a meeting.

Neither of these things strike me as being an effective response. I also think that both of these powers will likely be abused in the future, reducing what fragile liberties we already have.

And if you think the NSW Police are squeaky clean and would never abuse their powers, you haven't been watching channel 9 on Monday nights.

Underbelly: A Tale of Two Cities

Hurry up and wait

2009-03-12T14:57:00.004+11:00

Although this evidence could be best described as anecdotal, I am of the opinion that the closure of Hoxton Park has had the effect of making Bankstown aerodrome busier - perhaps too busy.

Wednesday morning. Dreary, overcast, occasional showers. Hop into FTU, make a note of the numerous gripes, none effecting airworthiness. The headset socket is loose, some oil drips on the front oleo strut, the flaps reluctant to spring back to zero degrees from extended, the park brakes won't lock on. FTU is quite an old bird, the register lists her rego date as December 1979. I was 7 at the time, and I'm no spring chicken myself. Having said that, I remember thinking to myself as I checked under the cowling, "damn, that is one clean engine."

Start up, grab the ATIS, taxi out to the run up bay, do some pre takeoff checks and taxi out behind a chieftain, intending to do circuits. Then I hear it.

"All aircraft taxiing for circuits report ready in the run up bay."

Bugger, followed by two other aircraft who had already done what I'd done, reporting they were finished their run ups and were already taxiing for circuits, waiting at other runways. In other words, I'm boned.

"FTU is also done with run ups and taxiing for circuits."

"FTU, is that you behind the chieftain"

"Affirm."

"OK, report when ready on tower frequency."

And I wait. The chieftain in front of me is waiting for an IFR clearance, which isn't forthcoming from Sydney control. So I wait for her, she waits for clearance, and a session of circuits looks less and less likely for me. I hear other training aircraft reporting they are shutting down, requesting a light signal once circuits are available. There's just too many aircraft trying to fit into a fixed area of space. Perhaps until recently the controllers were prepared to accept a few too many aircraft in the circuit, but in light of recent events are keeping a tighter rein on how many aircraft are permitted to train at once. If so then I applaud their actions.

This still leaves me locked out of the circuit today, so I report that I want to depart downwind to the training area and continue waiting for the chieftains IFR clearance. The pilot repeatedly asks for an estimate on the delay, Sydney must be flat out because they can't even get an estimate. Eventually she gives up and requests a VFR departure, hoping to pick up an IFR clearance in the air away from Sydney airport. I finally get clearance to line up on the runway and wait. I do so and wait. I don't like to do this as I can't see behind me, and I am worried someone will land on top of me from behind.

I am cleared for takeoff, and do so without delay.

In the training area west of Bankstown the cloud is low and threatening. There are no showers out here yet, but they aren't far off. A cloud of green smoke hovers over the ground beyond the pipeline. Soon a column of yellow smoke joins it, a plume of red smoke does the same. RAAF detonating smoke grenades at Orchard Hills. The chieftain pilot gets her clearance over Patonga to climb to 5500 and track direct Scone. I practice an engine failure, I practice steep turns. I get bored and check out the dam, then head back.

Approaching Prospect a heavy shower passes between me and Bankstown, obscuring the landscape. Although the rain doesn't bother me, the lack of visibility does, so I turn 180, find tadpole lake (Bankstown pilots will recognise this perennial water feature) turn 180 again and head back to Bankstown.

This time there is no waiting, I put in a respectable squeaker, which I'm quite proud of, exit the runway, taxi back to the aero club and shut down.

26 hours to go until I can start my commercial training.

Fletcher, Blacksmith, Pilot?

2009-03-08T02:23:00.003+11:00

US killer robo-plane makes strike without remote pilot

Although American pilots hate drone-driving duty, generally having to be ordered into it against their will, they are also very uncomfortable with the idea of mere enlisted tech specialists handling what are to all intents and purposes close air support missions using strike aircraft. This tends to call much of their raison d'etre into question.

This gets at the crux of the matter. No pilot worth his salt wants to sit inside a data centre while his aeroplane flys around without him. Even worse though, is an aeroplane that requires no pilot at all.

In which I update my whereabouts

2009-03-06T21:14:00.003+11:00

This blogging lark. Not so easy sometimes. One would think tapping away on the keyboard, converting thoughts into words on a screen, pretty straightforward. Not so.

So please excuse the paucity of posts in recent months. It isn't I've wanted to be incommunicado, Real Life (tm) has merely intruded.

I was studying hard for my ATPLs, put practical flying aside for awhile. For one reason or another I failed ATPL Flight Planning. This subject is a cast iron bastard, so I will need to restudy and resit the exam. Maybe I can pass next time. Maybe. In the meantime, the heart just ain't innit, see? Performance and Loading is a bit easier, so I will sit that one next before getting back into Flight Planning. After that I have Aerodynamics and Aircraft Systems, which I just looove to study. That will be my carrot.

I put off flying over summer, as I mentioned, it being too hot and sticky under the perspex and having other fish to fry, so to speak. The law and the club rules mean I have to fly 90 days before I can fly solo again, so Tuesday I went out to Bankstown to gain recency. Flew with a feller called Craig, who was very pleasant to fly with. Corrected me when my technique was slack, as is appropriate. Not pedantic, as am I. Gave me some excellent techniques. All good stuff. So once again I'm legal.

Speaking of legal, it was time for my annual physical, and isn't that just cheap and cheerful fun /sarcasm off. As usual, I paid an awful lot of money to some medical practitioners for the privilege of waiting, being messed around, stripping on command, being poked and prodded, shaved, having electrodes attached. Those blokes in Guantanamo would go on a hunger strike if they were subjected to such humiliations, and asked to contribute financially for it. End result - I am as fit as the proverbial stringed musical instrument. For another year. Yay.

You don't need to know. Trust us.

2009-01-26T20:17:00.005+11:00

China says internet censorship needed to keep children from harmful sites

Entirely laudible. It's not about censorship - it's about protecting the kiddies - and what kind of despicable monster is against protecting the kiddies? Exactly.

Minister welcomes advances in internet filtering technology

The internet is a wonderful tool that is delivering benefits to increasing numbers of Australian families but the Government wants to find ways to make it safer, particularly for children.

Look familiar?

A friend of mine runs a blog, Neptunus Lex. Jolly entertaining it is, thought provoking, and wholly suitable for the consumption of wee kiddies. Sadly, his website is blocked in China.

The Government wants to introduce a similar filter here in Australia. For the children. Just like the Chinese government has. So you'll excuse me for being cynical, especially when the list of blacklisted sites is classifed, restricted, unpublished. So you'll just have to trust them, that the sites they don't want you to see are nasty stuff that will herts the chidrens, and not say, a political dissenter criticising Labor policies, or a whistleblower exposing Government corruption.

Just trust them.

Update - Dentist, tuckshop cited on web blacklist

Alongside child porn, bestiality, rape and extreme violence sites, the list also includes a slew of online poker sites, YouTube links, regular gay and straight porn sites, Wikipedia entries, euthanasia sites, websites of fringe religions such as satanic sites, fetish sites, Christian sites, the website of a tour operator and even a Queensland dentist.

Other Australian sites on the list are canteens.com.au ("Tuckshop and Canteen Management Consultants") and animal carers MaroochyBoardingKennels.com.au.

The dentist, Dr John Golbrani, was furious when contacted to inform him that his site, dentaldistinction.com.au, appeared on the blacklist.

Yeah, you don't want to be exposed to the opinions of crazed fringe dwelling cultists. Like Christians. Or dentists.

The Minister for Broadband, Communications and the Digital Economy, Senator Stephen Conroy, has this afternoon denied that the list of banned websites published on Wikileaks is the ACMA blacklist.

"The published list purports to be current at 6 August 2008 and apparently contains approximately 2400 URLs whereas the ACMA blacklist for the same date contained 1061 URLs," he said in a statement.

"There are some common URLs to those on the ACMA blacklist. However, ACMA advises that there are URLs on the published list that have never been the subject of a complaint or ACMA investigation, and have never been included on the ACMA blacklist."

And this is entirely the problem, isn't it? There's no way we can tell if he's telling the truth or not, we simply have to trust him.

But if there's even a shred of accuracy about the list that has been published, it's pretty clear that the government CANNOT be trusted to censor the net for the common good. Which is pretty much what we all suspected, all along.

Further update

They can't be trusted.

Conroy admits blacklist error, blames 'Russian mob'

He is either incompetent or lying. Some choice.

The bees and the honeypot.

2008-12-18T22:24:00.002+11:00

Women killed as Sydney training flights collide in mid-air

Not much I want to add to that, except that my sympathies go out to the families of the pilots on board.

You don't the balls. No balls.

2008-12-09T07:19:00.001+11:00

An oldie but a goodie

There's no need to rub it in, jerk

2008-11-25T21:25:00.004+11:00

I can barely get through on medium and here he is laying waste to the hardest song on expert.

Question. Can the kid land a tailwheeler in a crosswind on a paved strip?

Didn't think so.

Plus I'm taller. Just.

Nowra Air Show

2008-11-06T22:35:00.003+11:00

I recently flew in to Nowra to view an air show, celebrating the 60th anniversary of the commissioning of HMAS Albatross.

White Ensign below a Sea King.

Mass flypast, a sight rarely seen.

Iroquois, belonging to the RAN historic flight.

DeHavilland Vampire belonging to the Temora Aviation Museum, repainted in RAN colours and performing a very graceful handling display.

Taxiing back.

C-47 Dakota belonging to the Historic Aircraft Restoration Society. I had the pleasure of following this aircraft on final on arrival at Nowra, and on takeoff at departure.

Sadly, my camera ran out of battery charge shortly afterwards, so no more photos.

Yul Brynner was right

2008-10-06T22:31:00.003+11:00

Do you smoke? You shouldn't you know, it's bad for you. I know that it is bad for you because I see at least three graphic and disturbing advertisements every day on television telling me how my legs will drop off, or I'll get cancer and die if I carry on smoking.

Oh, you don't smoke? Neither do I. Gave it up years ago. Bad for your health. Gives you cancer and makes your legs drop off.

So why the hell am I still subjected to these damn ads that turn me off my dinner every night? Because there are still people out there who smoke, who are slowly killing themselves and costing the taxpayer funded healthcare system a fortune doing it.

I don't need to be told not to smoke anymore, something radical needs to change, and sharpish.

In future, in order to purchase tobacco products, you will need to present a licence. If a police officer spots you smoking on the street you may also need to produce your smoking licence, just like you need to produce your drivers licence when in control of a motor vehicle.

The licence only costs around $100 per annum, the proceeds of which go towards funding the licencing system, with the remainder going to the department of health. We can use the existing RTA infrastructure for producing the licences, so the actual cost of administration should be pretty low. You will have to renew the licence once a year in person - if you are too ill or infirm to visit the RTA, then what hte hell are you doing smoking? You will have to watch a video of all the latest smoking ads, explaining just how bad it is to smoke. That way only those who currently smoke, or intend to smoke in the future will be subjected to them. This will save the taxpayer advertising expenses that normally go to newspapers and television stations. After the video, you will be recquired to pass a short knowledge test on the dangers and health risks involved with smoking to prove that you understand just how detrimental it is to you. If you are unable to pass the test, it is clear that you are unable to understand the dangers of smoking, and therefore need to be protected from doing yourself harm.

If you want to smoke, I believe you should be allowed to do so, but understand you are now in the minority, costing the community money, and you should be able to prove that you understand what you are doing, put up with some inconvenience for doing it, and put back some of that money into the public health system. Why the rest of us are still burdened so for your habit is beyond me. If the above described system had been in place when I was a smoker I would have quit much sooner, or not taken it up at all.

This won't happen any time soon, of course, but can anyone give me some intelligent reasons why it shouldn't happen?

First hair grows out of my ears, now this

2008-09-17T17:03:00.003+10:00

It was recently my birthday, and my wife Kirrily got me Guitar Hero III.

Short answer, it rocks. Literally. Now all the songs I hear on the radio are made of little coloured disks scrolling down a fretboard.

I'm playing it on 'easy'at the moment, and after three days practice I can play most songs 95% correct or so. I had a quick spin on 'extreme.'

WTF? Either I'm too old (a distinct possibility) or it's too damn hard. Maybe if I had a few spare weeks of constant practice I could do a half decent job.

But if you're going to put in that much effort - why not learn the guitar for real?

Sea Furious

2008-09-12T18:06:00.001+10:00

If I were a rich man...

Deedle-deedle-dum.

Erm, I think you're in my seat

2008-09-03T22:07:00.004+10:00

Stewardess in the pilot's seat: Flying High on Jetstar

Nothing wrong here.

The article implies that it is an offence for the first officer to be sitting in the left hand seat. This is a common misconception. There is nothing in the Civil Aviation Regs specifying which pilot is to sit in which seat.

Oops.

226 Dual controls
(1) During flight, a person may occupy a control seat of an aircraft
equipped with fully or partially functioning dual controls only if:
(a) the person holds an appropriate pilot licence for the type of
aircraft and the class of operations in which the aircraft is flown;
or
(b) the person is a student pilot assigned for instruction in the
aircraft; or
(c) the person is authorised by CASA.

In the strict letter of the law, the Flight Attendant (not the politically incorrect title 'Stewardess') appears to be in breach of this regulation. Although in aircraft certified for single pilot operations, a non-qualified person may occupy a control seat permitted they are briefed beforehand not to manipulate the controls, which certainly appears to be the case.

They have obscured the faces to protect the identities of the persons involved, prior to forwarding on the uuobscured photos to CASA and dropping them right in it.

But why obscure their watches?

Outrageous headline

2008-08-27T20:26:00.006+10:00

Trainee pilot's solo flight death dive

You can always trust Fairfax to put a sensational headline on an aviation story, can't you?

Training operations are inherently riskier than normal operations, hence there is a prohibition on carrying passengers whilst conduction training operations. This incident is a reminder of how unforgiving of errors aviation can be.

My condolences go out to the family of the pilot.

My sympathies to the person glaringly ignored in the article - the instructor who sent his young student solo, never to return.

Edit - update

Photos of VH-CGT, the second aeroplane involved, which made it back safely.

The pilot clearly did very well to get her down safely - personally I'm staggered she continued to fly at all with damage to the left flap, the rudder and half the horizontal stabiliser torn open.

Photos from an anonymous source, so apologies if this photo belongs to you, get in touch with me and I'll take it down or credit you.

Text appeal

2008-08-17T07:16:00.004+10:00

Controller praised for texting pilot down safely

FIVE PEOPLE on a flight from Kerry to Jersey received mobile phone text instructions from a quick-thinking air traffic controller when he guided them in to a safe landing at Cork.

In what air accident investigator John Hughes described in his report yesterday as a "serious incident", the twin-engined Piper plane lost all onboard electrical power, communications and weather radar soon after take-off from Kerry airport on November 7th last.

He paid tribute to the initiative of the air traffic controller, saying the loss of all aircraft electrics during a flight "is considered very serious".

I'm assuming it was a Piper much like this, and flying IFR.

Excellent work, but I do want to point out that there is no manned aeroplane I'm aware of that requires a radio to fly. The controller seems to get a lot of praise here, but I do want to draw the analogy of the pig and the chicken making bacon and eggs for breakfast. When it comes to the quality of the meal, although the chicken is certainly interested, the pig has a somewhat deeper level of commitment.

En Route Supplement Australia (ERSA)

Yes, I'm aware that the incident occurred in Ireland, and I am quoting the Australian rules, but both countries are ICAO compliant, so the rules couldn't be that different.

The rules state that in the event of a comms/navaid failure (which a total electrical failure certainly is,) the actions to take are as follows;

i) Squawk 7600

Set the transponder to 7600, indicating a radio failure on the controllers consoles. A pointless action in this case, as the transponder is electrically powered.

ii) Listen out on ATIS and/or voice modulated NAVAIDS

It's possible to transmit voice over many radio beacons normally used only for navigation, and one of the actions when a pilot selects a NAVAID is to identify that the correct frequency has been tuned by listening to the morse code that is being transmitted. Some aerodromes transmit their ATIS information, which indicates weather conditions among other things, over the nearest NDB.

Again, a pointless action in this case - the radios are electrically powered, and haven't we already established that all the sparks and blue smoke fell out of the box? Yes we did.

iii) Transmit intentions and normal position reports (assume transmitter is operating and prefix calls with "TRANSMITTING BLIND".) If possible leave/avoid controlled/restricted airspace and areas of dense traffic.

Many times the radio will fail to receive transmissions, giving the impression to the pilot of a complete failure, but will actually transmit just fine. Hence the instructions to transmit "BLIND." Shouldn't that be deaf? Anyway, another pointless instruction in this case because the pilot was in the dark. He really was blind.

(iv) As soon as possible, establish visual navigation.

By the sound of it, this is pretty much what the pilot did, along with the second part of instruction iii, to avoid dense airspace.

(v) Land at the most suitable aerodrome.

Sound advice that last bit, but how to find it without NAVAIDS, and to know if you're going to run into anyone with coordinating with a controller?

Most professional pilots I know carry a handheld radio for this situation. Using a mobile phone is also a good option, if you have a couple of appropriate phone numbers handy. It can be difficult to hear above the noise of the engines in a lot of general aviation aircraft, so the use of text is a not bad, if not preferred option. Ever had a miscommunication via text? Don't text and drive, how about texting while flying?

I had one instructor who had an attachment for his headset to allow him to use his mobile phone in flight. At first it was disconcerting to have him say on final "you land it, mate, I'm just going to take this call." Who said you can't use your mobile during takeoff and landing?

War nerd

2008-08-14T13:54:00.004+10:00

This bloke is usually spot on. Coop is always on the lookout for interesting websites to read. The archived War Nerd columns, if you can find them, are a pretty interesting read.

Waterbirds

2008-08-10T21:16:00.002+10:00

Sydney's first international airport was not at Mascot, where Kingsford-Smith International stands today. It was actually at Rosebay, on Sydney Harbour. This was where majestic flying boats arrived and departed, maintaining an enormously lengthy, and sometimes tenuous, link between Sydney and the rest of the world. The Museum of Sydney has an exhibition on the flying boat base and operations until the 14th September 2008. The exhibition itself is quite small, probably a reflection on how little regard Sydney has held for its heritage over the years. I attended a slideshow and lecture by Captain John McCluskey, who flew Sandringham flying boats for Ansett for many years after WW2. The service finally ceased operations in 1974, although floatplanes operate on Sydney Harbour to this day.

Come for the food, stay for the projectile vomiting

2008-08-07T13:54:00.004+10:00

If you do a google search for Il Centro restaurant in Brisbane, you might find descriptions like 'iconic,' 'award-winning,' 'sensational,' or 'unforgettable.' I certainly wont forget my visit there any time soon.

The signature dish there is the sandcrab lasagne, which tasted absolutely divine the first time I had it. Unfortunately it didn't taste quite so good four hours later on its way back up. Even more bitter was the experience of complaining to the manager about receiving a helping of food poisoning along with my food. When they decided to ring back the following day, it was simply to deny that they had any responsibility for the quality and cleanliness of their food.

It would have been sufficient to me if they had simply offered an apology. Not even that was forthcoming.

Highly recommended!!!!one

He's more afraid of you than you are of him

2008-04-20T13:47:00.003+10:00

Well, my medical certificate finally came back, hot off the presses, and stamped and signed in all the right places. Celebrated with an hour of night flying.

In the meantime - consider the bout of Generalus Dynamicus F111us vs Pelecanus conspicillatus

F-111 almost downed - by a pelican

Bend over and say credit or savings?

2008-03-27T10:40:00.003+11:00

What are pilots afraid of? Bad weather? Mid-air collision? Mechanical failure? Running out of fuel?

Ask any pilot what they are afraid of, what they loathe, and more often than not the answer you will get is - the medical exam. It's something that can't be avoided, flown over, planned around, repaired. Essentially you have little control over your fitness to fly. Although you can try and stay in shape, you can't avoid the nasty surprises your body has in store for you as you get older. When your sight/hearing/heart decides to quit, it just quits.

The second most common answer to come up would be - the regulatory authorities, CASA, FAA, CAA, whatever they happen to be called, the faceless monolithic bureaucracy handing missives from on high, seemingly at random and often at odds with commercial and physical reality.

Where the two meet is the Medical Certificate, a piece of paper verifying to all and sundry your physical and mental fitness to operate a flying machine.

And so I wait. Having paid the best part of $500 for the privilege of being prodded, poked, photographed, catalogued, scrutinised, jabbed with needles, attached with electrodes, orifices peered into, appendages fondled, endless forms completed, I wait. The medical profession have deemed me worthy. Still, I am grounded while the powers-that-be attend to other matters, before deigning despatch my treasured document, my Class One Medical Certificate. You can submit your medical certificate application up to 45 days before it is due, they tell me. Yes, I did. Apparently I haven't factored in my favourite public servants pissing off for Easter. Perhaps I will have more luck next year, when Easter falls a little later.

I gaze through the window at the birds flying past. Do they have medical certificates, I wonder? Probably not. They have no bank accounts, after all.

Relocation expenses

2008-03-20T21:26:00.002+11:00

A job for Lex, if he wants it...

PELAIR – PILOT WANTED - Ex-military fighter / strike

USE IT OR LOSE IT

Do you have the flying skills required for the Australian Defence Force fast jet training support contact?

Pel-Air Aviation is seeking applications from enthusiastic ex-military pilots with 500 hours fighter/strike to be employed flying Lear 35/36 and Westwind jet aircraft in the ADF fast jet training support contract based in Nowra.

Utilise the skills you have gained while enjoying the lifestyle you deserve.

Applicants will be required to obtain or hold an ADF Security Clearance.

Further information can be obtained by contacting the Pel-Air Defence Operations Manager:

Liz Anderson – 02 4422 5288

All applications will be treated in the strictest confidence.

Panoramic mountain

2008-03-12T05:16:00.003+11:00

Took a flight to Bathurst with two pax.

Three Sisters

Late final Bathurst

The steed resting in the weeds

Mount Panorama race circuit

Royal visitors

2008-02-26T13:04:00.004+11:00

The Queen Victoria and Queen Elizabeth II visited Sydney Harbour over the weekend, the QEII for the last time as she has reached the end of her sailing career.

The QEII, tied up alongside warships of the RAN.

The Queen Victoria surrounded by swarms of Sydney sightseers.

Pictures courtesy of my lovely wife Kirrily.

Progress impeded

2008-02-05T19:29:00.002+11:00

Planning another short trip out to Bathurst and back Friday 15th February 2008. Last time I was out that way everything was rather brown - I'm interested to see if the recent rains have greened up the landscape. Returning via Warragamba to check out the dam, too. If you're interested let me know.

Update - never saw the other side of the ranges due weather, but a nice view of the dam

Happy passengers

2008-01-26T09:20:00.002+11:00

Thursday 31st January I'm planning another flight to either Bathurst or Cessnock, weather permitting.

If you're interested, let me know, you need to be at Bankstown airport at 0730 - early start, I know. Should be back at Bankstown by 1100.

Same rules - first time flyers fly free, if you've flown with me before, be a sport and help chip in for gas.

update - Glen came along, and enjoyed himself immensely.

Not if you're braver than me

2008-01-20T01:47:00.001+11:00

Co-pilot kept cool head in crash landing

"Flying is about teamwork and we had a fantastic team on board," Captain Burkill told reporters at British Airways' London headquarters on Friday, before singling out Senior First Officer John Coward, who was at the controls.

Now, isn't that a perfect name for a co-pilot?

Harbour orbits

2008-01-17T17:06:00.001+11:00

My last invitation received a truly underwhelming response, but that won't discourage me from trying again.

I'm planning some orbits over the harbour on the morning of Tuesday 22nd January 2008 from around 0930 to around 1130.

If you're interested, let me know - it really is a spectacular way to see the city.

Same rules apply as before, except no weight restriction - first time flyers fly free - if you've flown with me before, be a sport and help me chip in for gas.

Update - David and Leo have agreed to come along, so I will post again on how it goes.

Update 2 - David and Leo enjoyed their flight over the harbour on Tuesday - pic follows.

2008-01-09T10:14:00.000+11:00

Took my brother-in-law for a flight on Sunday, from Wollongong, over to Mittagong, down to Nowra and a couple of orbits over his house, out to Culburra and then back to Wollongong via Kiama. Hot and humid day, with lots of puffy clouds to make it interesting. Another 2.8 hours. He spent the entire time taking photos - hopefully he will send me a couple I can post here.

*Update*

Here are the photos

Fitzroy Falls Reservoir

The mouth of the Shoalhaven River

Coolangatta Mountain (yes, I know it is only a hill)

Kiama

Wollongong Aerodrome, which is at Albion Park

2008-01-06T20:03:00.000+11:00

Reports of his death not so greatly exaggerated.

George MacDonald Fraser is, sadly, no more, and thanks to Lex for passing on the news. My favourite author, author of the Flashman series has died. As usual, I find this out several days/weeks/months after the event. However, when someone like Anna-Nicole Smith dies I get hourly updates.

Click on the link above and read it the whole thing, it's worth it for quotes like;

I think little of people who will deny their history because it doesn't present the picture they would like.

2007-12-27T03:16:00.000+11:00

Is it just me, or does Robert Deniro (or is it De Niro?) have the weirdest smile you've ever seen?

Look at that expression - he looks like he has seen the expression of joy on the faces of human beings, but can't quite replicate it on his own face. Watch 'Sleepers' sometime and notice how perfectly he fits in as a patient in a mental hospital.

Don't get me wrong, I love De Niro (or is it Deniro?) but it's easy to see why he usually plays dangerous psychopaths with perpetually clenched jaws.

2007-12-17T09:08:00.000+11:00

I'm now in the hour building phase of my CPL training - if you're free from 09:30-12:00 on Sunday 23rd December and want to come for a quick flight, drop me a line. The only stipulation is you must weigh 80kg or less. First time flyers fly free - if you've flown with me before, be a sport and help me chip in for gas.

Update - no one took me up on my offer, so JNB and I had a lovely flight on a perfect sunny day, and I moved two hours closer to my CPL.

2007-12-12T21:51:00.000+11:00

Pink - she's not here for your entertainment, which seems a strange attitude to adopt if you are a professional entertainer, but in her case one which I entirely agree with.

What have I been doing? Why have I not been updating? I got a bit fed up with the whole blogging "thing" (feel free to wiggled four fingers in the air in accepted imitation of inverted commas,) then I decided I would get back into it by posting my flights. A combination of lack of funds, poor weather and the current surfeit of suitable flight instructors meant I hadn't flown since October. But today I did.

Did you know there is a shortage of pilots? I do - the airlines have sucked up almost all the commercial pilots from general aviation, leaving hardly any instructors, only those who are happy in GA (yes, they are out there, but few and far between,) and those whose other qualities are deemed undesirable. Like sexual deviants. There are some instructors who undoubtedly fit into both categories.

You might have guessed I'm being facetious. Most pilots are sexual deviants as a matter of course, and it has never been an impediment to flying for an airline.

Before you ask - yes I do know there is a shortage of pilots out there, but given my lack of qualifications and experience I can't go and work for an airline just yet, but thanks very much for the suggestion, I know you mean well.

Todays flight was a quick 1.4 hours day VFR to Wollongong and back. I needed to get this done for an aeroplane flight review, which was due in November for me and without which I can't fly solo. Every two years this needs to be done, under the supervision of a suitable flight instructor, to ensure I haven't picked up any bad habits, like nose-picking or voting Democrat. This AFR (can't have an aviation term without an acronym, don't you know) would not have been necessary had I completed my night VFR rating before November, but c'est l'avion.

Down to Wollongong from Bankstown, instructor yawning and complaining he was bored, got me to fly overhead the field at 3000 feet then pulled the power off, glided all the way down to a gentle touch down with a gusting, swinging crosswind, then touch and go back to Bankstown. All very straightforward and good, clean fun.

So I'm legal again, until my medical is due in March next year.

2007-12-11T03:13:00.000+11:00

Net dumbs us down: Nobel prize winner

Don't you feel more stupider?

I personally don't think the internet makes your more or less stupid. I do think it makes you less ignorant, but there is a difference between knowledge and wisdom.

So why would she think this way? Were people noticeably more intelligent prior to, say, 1995? Apparently it's because people in developing nations want books and can't get them, whereas people in developed nations have books and don't read them.

I have my own theory about why people nowadays seem more stupider then what their did in teh olden days. It's not that there are more idiots about, it's just that you tend to encounter the fruits of their intellect more frequently.

The internet hasn't made people less intelligent, but it has provided easy outlets for their creativity. In ancient times, say, 1987, if you wanted to have your opinions read by the masses, you were reduced to handing out flyers, or you had to get your magnum opus published. Inevitably, publishers like to browse through the contents of the books they intend to publish. Thus, 99% of submitted works were rejected on the grounds they were utter rubbish, and the author clearly a dangerous lunatic. Nowadays, any halfwit with a digit-like appendage, a keyboard and an internet connection can vomit their outpourings on teh intarwebs for other mentalists and nimrods to read.

Much like this.

2007-12-11T01:00:00.000+11:00

Goodness, it has been quiet in here, hasn't it?

I promise I will post something soon, I intended to post about my next night flight, but that's a whole 'nother story.

Please pardon the post paucity, perhaps peruse this plane pron?

BZ's 2007 San Francisco Fleetweek

2007-09-14T04:22:00.000+10:00

Definition of a sine wave. This poor blokes day goes from bad to worse.

2007-09-11T16:53:00.000+10:00

Cessna vs Hornet.

You know what they say - just one heat-seeking missile can spoil your whole day.

I would call that 'punching above your weight.'

2007-09-04T09:09:00.000+10:00

This morning as i was getting into the car to go to work, I heard a disturbance across the street. The local gang of crows, mynahs and associated hangers on were making a ruckuss. I usually hear them going off when Houston the Wondercat goes outside for his daily constitutional, so I wasn't surprised when I saw the source of their consternation was the presence of a large grey cat.

My initial thought was "that cat must have a broken leg or something," as he moved along with a curious limping gait, as if reluctant to use its front paws.

My next thought was "damn, that is one ugly cat." I then realised this was no cat - it was a local celebrity, Mr Possum.

I'm very familiar with the works of noted street artist extraordinare Mr Possum. His favourite instrument is the roof of my house, performing a jazz percussion solo and scaring my wife with his rendition of 'Prowler in Gumboots.' He finances his lavish lifestyle by raiding the fruit trees in my backyard, to the extent that nary a piece of fruit is ever seen on the branch, while the ground is littered with nasty chewed plumstones and banana peels.

I don't know what he had done to upset the local avian banditos, but one large, fat crow had decided that enough was enough, and Mr Possum had overstepped his mark in some way. Possum was attempting to follow the footpath to attend a no doubt urgent rehearsal session, unable to proceed as the large, fat crow stood astride the path and squawked indignantly. Mr Possum ducked left, the crow checked his advance. He weaved right, the crow was too nimble for him. He stopped, sat back on his hind legs, and put up both fists like a boxer and prepared for a stoush. At this point, I decided I had to get a photo of this.

I walked across the street, and although Mr Possum didn't even acknowledge my existence, the fat crow was a little more skittish and took off, taking his posse of miscreants with him. Seeing that honour had been satisfied, Mr Possum resumed his journey. I'd described his motion as a saunter. Sauntering next door, he lazily climbed the front fence and disappeared into a bush.

15 seconds later a bloke appeared around the corner, taking his dog for a walk, and conpletely oblivious to the drama which had just unfolded. I took a photo, but all I got was a disappointing grey blob camouflaged neatly in front of a brick wall. You'll just have to take my word for it.

2007-09-04T07:26:00.000+10:00

The more perceptive visitors to this blog may have noticed that my fiance is now married. By implication, so am I. I have been too lazy to upload any photos yet, but I will do so soon. The wedding went off virtually without a hitch, my bride looked gorgeous, the honeymoon was great. Thank you.

2007-07-27T19:49:00.000+10:00

And the pilot-less jet will probably look like this.

Blended wing body concept - more efficient on a number of levels. It has less drag, so will require less thrust, and thus use less fuel. Because the fuselage intrudes into the wing, it will have more internal space, giving new meaning to the term 'wide-body.' With engines behind and above, it will be quieter to people onboard and on the ground.

2007-07-26T22:44:00.000+10:00

As much as I dream about owning a Javelin or a Replica Spitfire, I think I've finally found a fantastic aircraft I can nearly afford.

The Cessna 162 Skycatcher. Skycatcher? Sure, whatever. The 21st Century replacement for the Cessna 152, aviations equivalent of the Volkswagen Beetle. I think almost every civilian pilot since 1960 has some time in a 150/152. Personally, I love the little things. A Texas Taildragger conversion of an Aerobat with long-range tanks and a 160HP engine is my idea of fun. But I think I can accommodate a C162 instead. The name has GOT to go, though.

Now, has anyone got a spare $110,000?

2007-07-17T18:11:00.001+10:00

In Heaven:

* The police are British
* The cooks are French
* The engineers are German
* The administrators are Swiss
* The lovers are Italian

In Hell:

* The police are German
* The cooks are British
* The engineers are Italian
* The administrators are French
* The lovers are Swiss

2007-07-17T11:01:00.000+10:00

Robot Air Attack Squadron Bound for Iraq

Essentially a bigger, badder, faster version of the Predator, unit price somewhere around $20 million, for aircraft, spares and ground equipment.

Hattip to Neptunus Lex.

But it got me thinking - how long before the human pilot is obsolete, before the profession of pilot is as firmly in the past as blacksmith or fletcher? The role of flight engineer has been automated, and an increasing percentage of aircraft accidents are being attributed to human error. How long before this is the justification for eliminating the human element altogether? I think we could safely say 100 years from now, airliners will fly from place to place without any human intervention, perhaps only the inclusion of a safety pilot standing by in case of systems failure. From speaking with those inside the aviation industry, the only phase of flight that computers have problems dealing with at the moment is taxying. Obviously, speaking with air traffic control is too difficult for a computer, but this too could be overcome if an ATC computer were to talk to and issue instructions to the aircraft computer directly via a datalink. They already issue clearances this way in some parts of the world, the crew merely acknowledging with the push of a button.

I think the technological issues will be overcome in my lifetime, and then the only impediment will be human issues, i.e., the pilots association being none too happy with losing their livelihoods, and passengers being unconvinced of the safety of aircraft flying without human intervention, most not realising is how much is already automated. Once computer control is accepted, an aircraft requiring a human pilot will be viewed as 'quaint,' like a horse drawn carriage, or a steam engine.

But I'm not looking forward to it.

2007-07-10T14:10:00.000+10:00

The information ages is truly a remarkable thing. It has certainly enriched my life in ways too numerable to mention here. But I never really grasped the impact that it has on modern life until the last couple of days.

I am preparing my documents prior to lodging my tax return. As I have a leased vehicle, there are certain documents associated with reportable fringe benefits tax which also need to be submitted. I found an error in mine, a small descrepancy in the mileage over the year. Ordinarily a difference of a couple of hundred kilometres of mileage is neither here nor there. This difference is slightly unusual, in that it means being either under or over a 25000km threshold. As it stands I am under, and subject to pay 20% tax. If the discrepancy is corrected I am only subject to 11%. You can understand that I might feel strongly that the error be put right.

The starting mileage held by my leasing company is 14434kms. The starting mileage according to my records is 14178kms. 256kms. Hardly worth bothering about? Those 256kms mean I have to pay an extra $2000 in tax. Still think it's hardly worth bothering about?

I would never have picked up this difference had I not scrupulously (some would unkindly say pedanticall and anally) kept meticulous records every time I filled up with petrol and retained the printed receipt. When I first began keeping records I was cruelly mocked and treated with no small amount of derision. In fact when I read the notice from my leasing company I was disheartened to see that I would have a large tax liability, all for the want of a measily 78kms. Or roughly 5 litres of fuel. From my home to the CBD and back twice. A trifling amount.

Luckily my fiance Kirrily (Hi Kirrily! Look! I am on teh intarwebs!!!!111elevnty) is not so easily dissuaded by these setbacks. She is very inventive about finding ways around procedures and policies. Some would say she is downright sneaky and deceitful. Not me though. Gosh no.

So Kirrily examined my records closely and discovered the discrepancy, and also the receipt proving it! Hurrah we are saved! Not quite, the receipt is printed on thermal paper and has faded badly. It is still legible with the naked eye, but refuses to show up in a scan or photocopy. Machines see right through it, like some kind of zombie. Or maybe vampire. Whatever, I have the physical evidence backing up my claim.

You would think correcting this error would be as simple as advising my leasing company, who advise my company HR, who fix up the statement and make sure I don't end up paying too much tax. After all, I have the receipt, printed with figures which came from me in the first place anyway. Not so.

Neither the leasing company nor my companys HR departments are contactable in person. They are only contactable electronically. Which means I can't show them the receipt. And there is no electronic evidence supporting my claim. Subsequently I am having a very difficult time proving my claim.

So - and this is my point here - they are valuing VIRTUAL evidence above PHYSICAL evidence. Evidence which exists solely and a series of 1's and 0's within a computer system are regarded as more correct than the actual piece of paper from which the figure was derived! And the living breathing human who provided it! Even the telephone is regarded as a piece of technology too firmly rooted in the meatspace to utilise as a medium for communications, EMAIL is the preferred method. And so half of our correspondence is consumed with correcting misunderstandings arising from previous emails!

I need to lie down for a little while. Catch some virtual ZZZZZ's.

2007-06-18T02:27:00.000+10:00

I've been looking for something for a while now, and I think I've found it. I need a personal computing device, like a laptop or PDA, that can serve a number of functions. It also needs to be lightweight, and rugged, as I intend to carry it onboard a light plane and use it in flight. Preferably it should also be fairly inexpensive

The Eee PC. It has no moving parts, making it very resistant to shock damage - just the thing for handling turbulence. It weighs less than a kilo and is smaller than most conventional laptops - meaning it doesn't become a burden in a flight bag.

It really has become possible due to the maturation of several technologies, among them cheap flash memory (the The Eee PC has no hard drive,)the USB standard, LCD screen, longlife battery, wireless networking. That is, it doesn't bring anything revolutionary to the party, it brings a number of existing technologies together in an innovative way.

Calculate your weight and balance, connect to the internet and get up to date weather, conduct your navigation planning, lodge a flight plan, plug in a GPS unit and use it as a moving map GPS in-flight, arrive at your destination and cancel your flightwatch - all with the one, light and flexible unit. You can already do that with a PDA or Laptop, but I've always found PDAs too small to comfortably use on the ground, and Laptops to large to comfortably use in the air. Now there will be something that fits in between, and likely to be cheaper that either to boot.

Sadly it's not available until later this year. Maybe. In the meantime, I have some pencils to sharpen.

2007-06-03T22:57:00.000+10:00

What a bloody brilliant video - this bloke flies a circuit and lands, while handling a video camera at the same time - he must be an aviation God of the highest order.

In case you couldn't tell, I was being sarcastic. No wonder people keep cutting me off in the circuit.

Update - if you can't see the video, it is because the bloke has seen the error of his ways. That and the Pprune denizens giving him several varieties of curry in the comments for his video. He responded with the classic "don't tell me how to fly," which reminds me of the old King Gee advert "don't backchat me, I know boats." Pride cometh before a fall.

2007-05-30T16:49:00.000+10:00

Reasons to hold the APEC conference in Canberra (the nations capital,) not Sydney, number 247.

s7-h23.pdf

The Sydney basin will effectively be a no-fly zone between 30 August and 10 September 2007. From Wollongong in the south, to Warnervale in the north, and as far west as Katoomba, air traffic will be restricted to military aircraft, emergency aircraft (police, etc,) airliners and 'other operators,' presumably media helicopters.

If you feel like going for a joyflight in your Piper during that period, and God knows what a massive threat you are, youbetter get your fax in now - approval requests close 22nd June!

2007-05-17T19:02:00.000+10:00

PM a criminal, says Zimbabwe

"The Australian people should really stand against John Howard's Gestapo tendencies and interference with other states. He wants to cause insecurity in our country and that we will not allow," Dr Ndlovu said on ABC radio today.

"He is the international Gestapo and a criminal ... he is worse than anybody else, his actions in banning the cricket is just one example of being the Gestapo," Dr Ndlovu said of Mr Howard.

Godwins Law in full effect, and by a strange twist of logic, when one of Mugabe's cronies insults you, it's actually a compliment.